I am hard to find, easy to lose, and impossible to forget. Sound familiar? Yes, this is the status of VKontakte. Legendary, one might say. But those who seriously and for a long time post it on their page do not even know how funny it is to read it. Especially men, who are usually addressed with such statuses. And here's a selection of phrases that you should never (hear? Never!) Be allowed to post on your pages.
A real man is like a wolf: either alone or with one wolf forever! And chasing sheep is the lot of sheep!
I'm not a sweetheart for everyone's taste. I am a nut that not everyone can tackle!
It makes no sense to comprehend the meaning with meaningless thoughts.
The greatest hatred arises for those who managed to touch the heart and then spit in the soul.
I don't care what others think. This is my life, and I will live as I want.
Someone's beloved ... Someone's daughter ... Someone's sister ... Someone's friend ... And someone's throat! I am proud of my versatility !!!
Nobody congratulated me on my birthday today. No wonder, I don't have it today.
I never hold anyone ... Because the one who loves will still remain, and the one who does not love will leave anyway.
I want a heart of stone so that I do not feel offense, pain, or disappointment.
I do not like it when I am compared to someone. Not satisfied? Rest!
I am not an angel or a demon. And not ideal at all. Well, that's how I turned out. This is how the Lord created me!
ʁɔvʎнdǝвǝdǝu dиw - ɐwʎ ɔ vǝmоɔ dиw
Friendship between a man and a woman is possible; but in most cases, you've already mentally slept.
What am I dreaming about ?! Yes, just live ... breathe ... love ... and know that I am loved! And appreciate every moment ... Because our life is unique.
We are all like pencils. Everyone draws their own destiny. Someone breaks, someone dulls, and someone sharpens and moves forward.
I don't break the rules, I just live my way.
I live for those who need ... I am friends only with those in whom I am sure ... I communicate with those who are pleasant ... And I am grateful to those who appreciate.
Everyone can see how you look on the outside, but very few of those who know what is in your soul.
Winter was created in white for this purpose, to start your life from a white sheet.
There is an end to everything in life. Love ... Friends ... Suffering ... But there is no end to only one - Memories ...
You shouldn't be too persistently interested in my life. It can be so interesting that you will be disappointed in yours.
You are wrong if you say you know me. Everyone knows me as much as I allow myself to be recognized.
People say you changed when you just stopped acting the way they wanted.
I have a furry character! Yes Yes! Like a hedgehog!
In life, like in the rain - there comes a moment when it just doesn't matter ...
I don’t get to know each other, don’t give me a phone number, don’t agree to dates. But ... I respect your choice =)
My life. My choice. My mistakes. My lessons. None of your business.
LIVE, COLOR and GOOD! I don’t regret what happened! I don’t guess what will happen! And what is - I adore !!!
I want chocolate-covered chocolate ...
Strong is not the one who can put on the shoulder blades with one glance, but the one who is able to lift from his knees with one smile.
I am like a chameleon ... Now sad and silent, now serious and rude, now calm and gentle, now crazy and laughing until I drop.
I give a smile to everyone. A glance - to a few. The heart is one.
Cruelty is a character trait of kind people, it arises when they begin to wipe their feet about your kindness.
In my life there was and will be anything, but with me people laughed more often than cried.
I will not prove to anyone that I am good. Let them try to prove to me that I am bad.
To all those who are so interested in my life, I officially inform you: I am still: young, beautiful, happy and not even on a diet !!!
Happiness is when your happiness is happy next to you ...
I do not know how to half love or be friends, or I will give my whole soul, or nothing.
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We don't swear, we talk to them ...
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Perhaps for some, mate is an obscene language, but for chess players it is their daily bread.
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Mat is the emotional coloring of words.
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Mat is the language of primates. Decide at what stage of development you are ...
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I swear several times a year. Mat, like any potent remedy, is useful only in small doses.
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And anyway, it's time for me to unlearn the mate, fucking already.
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Words are the wind, and swear words are a draft that is harmful.
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Mat is the concentration of thought and feeling.
After all, you can't say: "Maria Petrovna is like that woman who cheats on her husband right and left with different men."
And you can put it in one word ...
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I imagine how I will swear during childbirth.
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The fact that girls should not swear was invented by guys who never did hot wax hair removal and did not suffer from an asshole))
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Smart and beautiful girls do not use foul language - they have a good enough vocabulary and a sharp mind to express their thoughts in a different way. Only cheap ones allow themselves to speak obscenely - this is precisely their level and an indicator of their status in society ...
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- A puss * ism treated? - No. - Okay, don't give a fuck.
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A Russian can, even need to use foul language in China. Whatever mat is all, then the name, then the surname will be.)))
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Dear friends, colleagues, classmates and all those who sent the best wishes in the past year! I hasten to inform you that neither x * I have turned, therefore, in the coming year I ask you to send money, gifts, martinis!))
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Irony is the best way to do without mate, but the most real is to get it in return.
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Chess on the Internet is richer: checkmate not only ends the game, but also accompanies it.
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Even when switching to a hexameter, he spoke exclusively with obscenities.
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I was standing in a shopping center yesterday, a mother and her son, a little boy 5 years old, pass by. This mother, accidentally touched the cars with a bag and they fell from the window, son to the whole store, - "Come on, since ... everything is here!"
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When will computers finally come up with the voice command "Fuck!" undo all recent actions?
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Chess is such an intelligent game, and you can't do without checkmate.
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- I will kiss you for every mat.
-Oh * nt ...
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In our time, there are only a few people who do not swear!
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I will never go on a roller coaster ride with my parents, because they are simply not ready to hear such an abundance of obscenities from my daughter
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One had only to add mate to the horoscope, and everyone suddenly became lovers of astrology ...
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Our confidence in the future is usually expressed in an obscene form.
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Swearing is an opportunity to harmoniously move from: “Sorry, I didn't mean it on purpose” to the fight itself.
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It is better to see a child's mat than hear an adult.
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Nothing contributes to the achievement of the heights in the art of foul language more than instructions for assembly and use.
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Slangs come and go, but the checkmate remains.
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So word for word ... and learned mate)))
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And why "once and for all eradicate" mate? Mat is sometimes needed. Moving the cabinet without it alone is completely unrealistic.)))
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The eyes are afraid, but the lips are cursing ...
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When we entered the room, he was sitting on the rubble of his furniture and was obscenely surprised at our appearance.
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At first he called me his little girl ... and a year later I became Oh * Eating Fool ... how is that ???
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Don't swear to yourself. There are more worthy candidates ...))
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It's ugly when a girl swears. - And when a healthy man yells obscenities, it sounds like a Bach symphony?
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Dear you swear more than me, and I'm a man!
- What, teach?
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If asked - “which is more expensive? love, parents, friends? " you silently u * bi in the face, you can’t ask such a question!
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Invent someone "Antipizdin" ... I already know who to prescribe it.
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I understood why Mat is needed! In colloquial speech, it perfectly replaces emoticons ...)
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- Why are there no 2-storey buses in Russia? - Because we have 2-storey plugs with a 3-storey mat.
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Swear words offend the lips from which they come as much as the ears that they enter.
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I don’t like to use foul language, but sometimes I understand that THIS cannot be described in other words.
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Freedom of speech eliminated the need to choose expressions.
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You can’t take with arguments, get to * bite to spelling!
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"When they write to you" clear ", it feels like they write" well, fuck * y "
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Checkmate is a way to survive in extreme conditions.
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It is only with our obscenities that one can not only offend, but also praise.
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The trouble of our time is that checkmate is no longer exclusively a chess term.
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You don’t drink, don’t smoke, don’t use foul language ... What a charm ... And you haven’t learned to shit with butterflies yet?
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It doesn't matter that I swear so hard and a lot ... The main thing is that I do it sincerely!
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Well, lovers of hiding their tears in the rain. Go for a walk.
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The situation is nowhere worse, it always saves me - all the fuck * yu.
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The psychologist:
- Doctor, I am pathologically distrustful of people. It seems to me that I am constantly being deceived ... Can you help me?
- Certainly can.
- What a bastard - p * zdit and does not blush!
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To connect words with swearing does not mean to speak coherently.
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You are all so different, but everything was so alike ...
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I am like the wind, changeable: sometimes hu * y, then shy))
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As they say, using asterisks in swear words is like doing a blowjob in the square and covering your mouth with your palm.
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If a girl swears, do not consider her vulgar and without cultural ... Perhaps she cannot find other affectionate words for you :)
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Adding mate when communicating, improves understanding!)))
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I never swore dirty obscenities!
My mat is always clean, fresh, tidy and smells like alpine meadows.
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The high IQ made it difficult to shout -fuck you!
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Life is not chess! Here, one mate is not enough!
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Do not use foul language, you are a girl !!! Show the fact!
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Let's talk to each other culturally - instead of the phrase: "Fuck you ...!" say: "I refer you to the original source"
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I never liked mate, I must give him his due - he so vividly and clearly expresses inner emotions from negativity to admiration that sometimes he is simply irreplaceable :)
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You have to bring bitches to bed. Bringing breakfast is fucking shit ...
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Girls, do you want to quickly explain something to a man? Do not worry: swear through every word (and in special, difficult cases it is possible more often), and you will see how simple everything is! The effect is amazing!)))
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At the twentieth minute, the play on words ended with obscenities.
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The milling machine operator said the annual norm of the mat when he entered the Dolce & Gabbana boutique.))
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I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I faint at the abusive word!
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When we talk about the most important, About the eternal or just about the instant, Why swear three-story obscenities, After all, you can impose an ordinary one?! ()
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Somehow I immediately got sick of knocking on ICQ to a person whose information says: "I can send x * y in 30 languages."
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Do you want to unlearn the mate? Easily! Month. On the sea. Bezotluchno. With parents. Checked!
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Life is not chess - checkmate alone is not enough for the king to resign
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Sometimes at work you just want to use obscenities ...
But I'm a woman ... You can't ...
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I wanted to put the password to the mail "x * y". I was told that it should be longer.
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Mat is the very sounds that are sometimes emitted during emergency brain inhibition.
Author Zulnora
Statuses about mat, obscene
She walks along the sidewalk, dances, hums, smiling at bewildered passers-by. Madness? No, happiness.
The thirst for the unknown, but desired with the heart, driven to madness, is considered an attribute of human passion.
Best status:
I was worn out, exhausted and the ball in the palace soon. The fairy godmother with an outfit, crystal shoes and a carriage is in no hurry.
In the morning at work, the internal confrontation between hunger and drowsiness does not stop.
Falling in love, I went crazy. The phase shift in the brain was due to ardent, romantic love.
[We are stubborn with you like children, we are fighting a crazy battle. It's winter in my heart, dreams of summer, be patient, this world is like that. We see each other less often now, you and I, and what is to blame? ..] (c)
Let your voice not sound like a mad echo in my ears, let the crowd not see your face - but in your nickname I know every letter, and shudder when I come across similar words ... But your avatar dreams me at night ... Damn virtual love.
Evil people ... go everywhere with undisguised anger, and I, like a fool, stand alone in the center of this crazy crowd and smile ..
They say that it helps a lot from insomnia when you start counting sheep ... Igor, Artyom, Lyosha, Vital ...
If you are trying to close the refrigerator looking for the cross in the upper right corner, then you are clearly overworked!
Man is not created for work, and here is the proof - he gets tired of it!
in contact, the blonde asks the guy: -are you sleeping? -no! -aa ... well, when you fall asleep write ...
Why is she crying? - Never mind, she's crazy. He smokes coffee, drinks cigarettes, laughs when it hurts, cries when it's funny, whispers abrupt words, rolls his eyes when he hears the word love and draws something in his notebook. Fool! -And in my opinion you are a fool, since you do not understand anything ...
New action: for each of your fairy tales, my ... (c)
Well, even if I'm not the best, well, even if I don't have a luxurious apartment in the center of Moscow, and even if my parents are not bankers, and even if there is no best guy, but I have friends who love me the way I am 🙂 Such crazy fool 😀
He pulled her close to him, and ruffling his hair, whispered “Baby, I hate you for your crazy actions, but I miss you so much when you are not around. I would trade you in heaven for life. "
A logical person gives the impression of being insane ...
Well, yes, everything is, in principle, top, outside there is a smile from ear to ear, a sweet good-natured look, and what is going on in your head in your soul, no one should care ...
Yes, I will do whatever you want, just to do nothing!
How to make it so that to do nothing, but to do nothing!?!?!?
when he first saw her, she screamed very loudly, screamed, behaved absolutely uncivilized and defiant, at that moment a thought came to him that had never even come close before, he thought that he really wanted this crazy hysterical gave birth to his children
I am sweet emotional pain tearing your brain apart ... Crazy energy provoking you to a convulsive dance ... The brightest musical hallucination ... The thrill of air and nerves ... In the end, I am just horror, which some consider music. I am the dark side of drum and bass
It’s necessary not to get enough sleep ... to put the phone in the fridge ...
everything is fine. even if it's bad, I won't tell you that anymore. you are not what you were. a stranger behind a closed door (c)
You infected me with yourself and this disease for life, while there is only one cure for this insane disease - YOU!
And when on the street people pass me by and quietly whisper: "Crazy", I will turn and yell: "Exclusive!"
I knit - I knit. I knit - I knit ... but no sense ... you will have to buy threads and knitting needles))
Would be cute to your liking, with a lovely paradise and in a hut ... (c) 700 sq.m. with a pool and a guest house, and in the garage a couple of Bentleys and Porsches ... XDD
Who gets up early is the first in line!
suddenly a war - and I'm tired ...
we were so eager to grow up, and now we have grown up, now we want to go back from these eternal problems, these feelings, this emptiness in the soul, but that's it, it's too late
You behave like a fool, you pretend that you are not attached to him, you do some crazy things ... And he loves you. However, as you are.
Taking this opportunity, I want to express my deep gratitude to all my former men for those crazy, unforgettable days filled with joy and happiness that I was lucky enough to live right after our parting: P
No aggression, kid. Bring calmness to this crazy world - this is where your originality will be. ©
Indifference settled in her eyes, from which they turned from dull green to cold, emerald, smoldering with some crazy spark. As if she was glad that she was dying ... The moon was reflected in her dilated pupils as a bright spot.
princes come to princesses. but to me only the mad hatter, in my opinion, will come ...
It's just me going in the morning in a minibus trying not to wake up completely to get a good sleep while still at work ???)
