Hilarious contact statuses attract users with a good sense of humor, so they see you as a potential interlocutor, whom they may lack so much in real life. Hilarious statuses will instantly tell everyone that you are in a wonderful mood. To do this, use our collection of statuses, downloading them in free mode at no cost.
In classmates, hilarious statuses are used not only to demonstrate the mood. If someone you know is in trouble, then cheer them up by posting such phrases on your page. When you come across a funny phrase or anecdote, tell your friends about it, this is your chance to become the life of the company.
Rzhachnye statuses in ICQ give a positive. Even the most shy and humble person, having written a hilarious status, becomes a star among his friends. Conquer the image of a perky and cheerful person, writing just a couple of lines! Remember, in ICQ you can be what you want, regardless of whether you are so sociable in life.
All good mood and hello!
If you are interested in funny and hilarious statuses, then I have something to offer you. In this article, there are as many as five sections about different and cool statuses with the meaning of a beloved one.
And if you consider yourself "cocky", then you have the wrong address, so press, here you will find what you are looking for.
New, cool statuses about yourself, beloved, clearly with meaning
A clear and cool status with meaning is the key to a good understanding of your mood by other people. Therefore, choose any new statuses for yourself, your beloved, to show the rest of your life spirit.
- I know how to forgive insults, but you may have to wait for this for a very long time.
- Men, don't ask me a stupid question - where have I been? It is clear that it is not with you)
- When my favorite music is playing - I like to be lazy)
- I can’t determine how much champagne to drink in the morning so that it is kind ...
- Today I posted an ad in the newspaper ... lost my white line (
- I dream of such a bed ... which would stand on the seashore)
- In order not to go on again ... it is better not to return to my life!
- From now on I will be more careful ... men are now very weak and touchy)
- Besides the crown, I also have a scepter!
- Touch my bones more often - I love massage!
- I am not a stool and will never break!
When nobody pisses me off, then I'm just darling!
Whoever doesn't like my face, you better shut up, otherwise your teeth won't grow back again)
I'm ready to wait ... but only a waiter with my favorite dessert!
I want to marry for love, but in my understanding, love is a fur coat, diamonds, a car ...
- Fear my silence! After all, something will definitely follow him)
- I don't have time to discuss my personal life!
- I confess that my most erogenous zone is my hands, and when there are a lot of green bills in them)
- And why am I not a flight attendant? I would send everyone from the heights of heaven)
- I want the boomerang law to work when I spend money!
Funny statuses about yourself, about the positive
When you are in a great mood, then you can amuse yourself with the statuses presented below.
- My years so fly that they blow off my hat!
- So many cases have accumulated ... but I'd better go to bed)
- If I don’t have culinary reposts on my wall, it doesn’t mean that I don’t know how to cook!
- In any case, I will cost you dearly!
- The most delicious thing that you can find in my house is Me!
- Why do I do whatever I want? - Because there is no ring on the ring finger!
- With my best friends, I always clean up the correspondence in the social networks)
- I can talk not only with my tongue, but also with my foot)
- When I have spring in my soul, then a meter of snow is not a hindrance!
- I am a smart woman (girl, woman), because I will always make a man guilty!
- I'll make a certain amendment - I'm not a riddle, but a riddle!
- When I sleep - I'm perfect!
- I'm so unpredictable and I'm not going to change!
- Where do I light up? - Ask Google!)
- I'm just superb! Keep your fists for me)
- Nobody can destroy my plans! Because they are not, and I live one day!
I can be like an onion - just as bitter and a mark!
I do not have a cold of love and therefore do not act recklessly.
- Sponsor of my life - good mood every day!
- My second profession is a fairy godmother)
- I just regularly go to depilation, and so I'm fluffy)
- I give preference to dancers ... who are ready to dance to my tune)
- I'm ready to sacrifice my expensive lipstick, but only so that the mascara never spreads!
Short statuses for women, with a meaning to themselves
In general, all statuses here are short. They are easier to read and will suit any woman or girl. In addition, these statuses are written with a meaning to yourself, beloved and wonderful.
You know exactly what I give to see about my life.
Now I am in a mood that I want to become a cat and climb a tree.
Your dissatisfaction is at the level of the fifth point!
I have a faithful friend - a job. How dear she is sometimes to me!
If I'm not laughing, that means what I think!
When I find myself in an incomprehensible situation, I start dancing ... let everyone be also in incomprehensible ways!
- You won't be able to ride over my ears - my ears are small!
- Everyone says to me: "Take the true path already!" Where is that road? Where to become?
- What I am not, but for someone I am the woman of his dreams.
- Don't look at my photo! Just a bad photographer.
- She promised everyone to quit smoking ... and now how to live, how am I thinking ?!
- In my heart I have an incomprehensible age - sometimes I am hunting for maternity leave, then I am already retiring ...
- Don't talk to me about marriage! Do I look like a suicide?
- I ask heaven about one thing - give happiness to the woman whom I see every day in the mirror!
- My plans for the first five-year plan are to lose weight by the summer.
- I give free recitals - I play on my nerves professionally!
- A delicate violet can be hidden behind a photo of a cobra on an avatar.
- I have a motto in my life - even if everything is bad, I try to smile sweetly.
- I am a mixture of a hedgehog and a dandelion!
New, cool statuses "about my beloved"
In this section, new statuses are presented, the meaning of which is about you, beloved, and not about me, as written in the title. I think this is not important, since the meaning of cool statuses does not change from this. Take your pick!
- I will help to remove not only damage, but also money from accounts)
- If they ask me: “Do you need tea or coffee?”, Then I will choose the sea!
- I never shrug off. I saw slowly!
- Why should I behave like everyone else? I'm the only one in my mind)
- I do not need to be diagnosed because I am happy!
- I love everything black! And even when I find myself in an emergency.
- I'm not a squirrel to be fluffy for everyone.
- If they put horseradish on me, then I'll pickle it with cucumbers)
- When I love, I torment, irritate and take offense)
- The recipe for happiness is very simple - take me and carry me in your arms!
- I’m crazy, but I’m comfortable.
- Especially regal views on life are not accepted to work!
- If you are ready to put up with me, then you are very courageous!
- Why am I not attracted to men. Maybe I lost the magnet?
- Losers have no chance of being around me!
Even though I am blonde, I know what laschi is)
I am all glowing, because a personal electrician is a professional!
- I have two hands! Therefore, today I can feed with one, and tomorrow I can strangle the second)
- From tomorrow everything will be different for me! But I haven’t decided exactly yet)
- If I am not beautiful, then this is absolutely none of your business!
- Although I’m fine with diction, I can still hiss as best I can!
- I do not like to stay at home, because why would I have such an ass then?
Cool, hilarious statuses, to myself
Every person loves to laugh and "make fun". Therefore, if your goal is to have fun, then hilarious statuses will be in the subject and will make you stand out from the gray crowd.
- My husband will never find my stash ... because he has no periods)
- I am always calm, then my character is just nervous.
- Ask, where did I get such a chiseled figure? - I admit that I sharpen at night)
- My eternal age is 20, and everything else is experience!
- What a blessing that the priest is in the back - I don't see it and calmly eat sweets)
- I am a great friend! It's cool with me in any * opera)
- As for me, I'd rather be burnt with shame on Sunday than dying of boredom on Saturday!
- I like to quote the statements that Omar Khayyam wrote - they can be a good substitute for the messages to xyiam)
- Previously, I lived according to my conscience, but now it’s turn to be headless)
- The female praying mantis is close to me in spirit, therefore, men, think about it!
- I never listen to the advice of others, but prefer to mess with myself)
- I can find a way out of any unpredictable situation. But how I find the entrance there is a mystery!
- Sometimes I look at my things in the closet and think that some forty have brought them there)
- I want to hear three words from my beloved every day - sleep until dinner!
When I am silent, then lightning shoots somewhere)
For whom I drank - that very wood!
- Do not try to spit in my direction - you will not surpass me anyway!
- My only competitor in voicing thoughts is Zhirinovsky)
On this site, in addition to funny statuses about yourself, your beloved, there are many others, no less and. All statuses are new and modern. Therefore, to show your cool mood, be sure to put them on.
That's all, for now, but do not forget to look at the light, there is a lot of interesting and useful things here.
If you are sad or tortured by smart thoughts, then you just need to get distracted and a little, so to speak, "neighing")). New and old hilarious statuses with meaning always at your disposal. Cheer up your beloved or loved one. And the surest way is to post a hilarious status on Odnoklassniki or hang it on your Vkontakte wall. Also hilarious statuses suitable for ICQ or mail.ru agent. Seeing such a status with you, friends will definitely add similar statuses to themselves and the fun will increase by an order of magnitude!
Where can I get new hilarious statuses?
On our site constantly appear new hilarious statuses... They are shared by visitors to our resource, the main audience is youth and students. And what could be more fun and hilarious company of young people? Only statuses that are born as a result of communication, fun and parties.
All hilarious statuses come from life... Everyone in life has funny moments that can be expressed in a short quote, an expression with a deep philosophical meaning, but in a comprehensible hilarious form!
So, if you have a new hilarious status, add it to our website to amuse other people! Also at your disposal
Women are such touching creatures, so I would touch and touch.
Who gets up early ... he, the infection, enrages everyone, slams the doors, rattles the kettle and walks like an elephant!
A person who will figure out how to fill his face via the Internet will make billions !!!
Since there is little time, I will briefly explain it with obscenities.
Every girl has a gift to shove more into her bag than is possible by the laws of physics.
Marital status: there is a cat.
Whom I want I don’t know, whom I don’t want.
Dad decides everything at home !!! And who is our dad - mom decides!
We have Halloween every Friday in Russia. The men are drunk as devils, and the women are waiting for them at home, evil as witches.
A diet that works 100% is called "Don't put food in your mouth."
Old age is when you buy a box of popcorn for the fiber, not for the surprise inside ...
Yesterday I went to bed at 21: 30 ... From such happiness I could not sleep until 3 o'clock ...
I look at the world with blue eyes through rose-colored glasses, so everything is purple to me.
A very cheerful old age awaits us. Imagine how many old women with tattoos on their backs will be around!
Do you think onions are the only vegetable that makes people cry? Didn't you get a melon in the face?
I collected some money, wanted to buy a dacha near Mytishchi. Not enough. I had to take a villa in Spain.
My conscience does not torment me, it shares its share and receives a percentage from each of my dirty tricks.
My life is so sad ... But nothing, but the salary is ridiculous ...
Unpredictability is the main trump card of women, with which they easily beat any pitiful card of male logic !!!
I do not suffer from delusions of grandeur. We princesses do not have this.
Why, when there are two girls on the avatars, is the owner of the avatar always ugly?
The wind, which accidentally lifted the letters, delivered them faster than the Russian Post.
I am already so grown up that this year I am planning to buy not a fashionable jacket, but a warm one.
All my dream is to make myself a T-shirt, with the inscription "I am a schizophrenic" on the front, and "I am too" on the back.
Smile: it makes people wonder what is on your mind.
Dreaming of a spectacular butterfly flutter into the Antalya heat, I lie as a larva on the sofa and quietly devour a sausage ...
If you are wrong and are silent - you are wise, if you are right and silent - you are married.
I'm not completely useless, I can be a bad example.
When you start throwing away junk, the main thing is not to start looking at it !!!
If God were a woman, then there would be the only commandment: Do not infuriate me.
Once in an idiotic position, behave simply and naturally, like a real idiot.
No good story begins with the words: "Somehow my friends and I eat a salad ..."
Here, they say: "You are strange ... You came, played a dirty trick, and left !!!" This is not strange! It would be strange to come, mess with and stay ...
It's easier to give than to explain why you won't.
Whoever gets up early is tired by twelve.
To avoid being blown away, try not to eat after six or smoke near the gas station.
I bought gifts for the new year ... two radio-controlled cars so that my husband and child don't get into a fight ...
In life, you need to be unpredictable and insidious, like a cucumber with a bitter bottom.
Only a Russian person, looking at a beautiful picture, can swear with admiration.
It's good to be blonde - new discoveries every day.
After the fifth drink, she realized - he was waiting for her call!
A very greedy girl went to throw out the trash and returned with two bags.
Who does not take risks, he does not drink champagne ... and does not listen to Mendelssohn.
Sometimes I say I don’t know. I know, but I'm too lazy to explain.
Sometimes alarms help you wake up. But more often than not, they interfere with sleep.
