“When should I start playing with the baby? Is it time yet or should I wait a couple of months? How do you even play with her? My imagination is only enough for “peek-a-boo”, I can also shake a rattle, but what else can I do for such a baby?” - my friend, new mother Polina Ushakova, just bombards me with questions.
And, really, when to start playing with a child, and how to choose a game according to age that will not tire the child and will be useful and interesting for him?
Baby under one year old: “Mom, play, and I’ll watch!”
It seems to you that in the first months a newborn is only able to sleep and eat sweetly, “he has no time for games yet,” you will think, and you will be mistaken. Yes, the baby is just learning to be part of this big world, but simple, unpretentious games will help him with this.
Age 0-6 months
Purpose of the game: development of reflexes, the five basic senses of a person.
There is no point in “entertaining” a baby at such a tender age; he is not very happy with the game yet, and you should not expect any result at all. The game is now part of the world, so new for the baby.
How to play: at this stage of development, the most ordinary things can act as a “game”: mother’s touch, stroking, conversation with the child, parents’ smiles, and even ordinary gymnastics can turn into exciting activity, you just have to show your imagination.
Example of a simple game: As we remember, our goal is to develop the baby’s basic senses. For example, such a simple and fun game: tie a small bell to the toddler’s leg or arm, the baby will quickly realize that the source of the interesting sound is himself, or rather his movements.
Watch (free at)
Age: 6-12 months
Purpose of the game: teach the child to watch the game, because he is not yet able to play himself.
A six-month-old baby who occupies a predominantly horizontal position and only says “Aha!” it will be difficult to “play”; even the simplest fun is not yet available to him. Therefore, the mother will play instead of the baby, the child’s task is to be an attentive observer.
How to play: At this age, it’s time to add nursery rhymes, nursery rhymes, songs and rhymes to “mom’s arsenal”. Even ordinary washing while listening to Moidodyr’s speech or feeding while listening to “Magpie-Crow” will be exciting for the baby.
Example of a simple game: This is the very age when it’s time to remember traditional, folk “entertainment”. “Magpie-Crow” is not just a recitation of well-known rhymes, but also a reenactment of the plot: the magpie and its babies are the little fingers, we bend them gradually, while cooking porridge, we stir it through the air with an imaginary spoon. It will seem to you that the child does not understand anything yet, in fact, his imagination is already working!
As you get closer to the age of one year, you can also involve the little one in the game; ask him to roll a ball, stroke a doll, and it is in the game that you teach him to hold a spoon correctly and drink from a cup. Games up to one year old have practically no “entertaining” role; this is another way for a baby to adapt to the new world.
One year and three months: “Mom, I play like you!”
If in the first period only the mother plays, and the baby is only able to observe, then at about the age of one year and three months the baby begins to join the game. He does not recognize it as an independent action, he only imitates his mother, acting out similar situations.
Purpose of the game: teach to repeat not individual actions, but entire “scenarios”, because a baby can simply pick up a spoon himself, but feeding a doll is much more difficult, and therefore more interesting.
How to play: no intricate plots, it’s too early to “save” the princess from a toy dragon, now is the time to play out daily everyday processes: sleeping, eating, washing, waking up, etc.
Example of a simple game: The first “helper” will be a doll or teddy bear. “Bring to life” the toy in the eyes of the baby, show where its eyes and nose are, demonstrate how the bear dances and the doll sits on a chair. It is not individual actions that should be played out, but entire scenarios from ordinary life. The doll washed her hands, sat down at the table, began to eat porridge, the plate was empty - the porridge would have to be “invented” - and therefore the baby’s imagination works.
Do you think it’s so simple and the baby can feed the bear himself? No, he will never figure it out until you show everything in the smallest detail. Therefore, “blow on the porridge,” put a bib on the bear and wipe his mouth after eating.
Until about one year and ten months, children do not come up with the plot of a role-playing game, so they will repeat what you showed them. If you have taught how to feed a bear, then everyone without exception will be “fed”: the bunny, the dog, and the robot. At this age, it is important that toys are always at hand; do not hide them on the top shelves.
Download our checklist and find out the most interesting Mind games for children from 2 to 5 years old!
Age 1, 10 months – two years: “Mom, play with me!”
The repetition period gradually gives way to independent play, though not alone, but still with mom. The child not only repeats your game script, but also makes his own adjustments to it. At this stage, he really needs verbal communication, and it is in the game that he learns to call “things by their proper names.”
Purpose of the game: Control, but not correct, give free rein to children's imagination, explain every action, and not just play it out. Develop the baby’s imagination and horizons, draw his attention to the most inconspicuous things: to a flower on the street that you can smell or give to your mother, imagine how a bee lands on it, or turn into this bee yourself.
How to play: There are three skills that are important to “master” at this age.
- The child must act out the simplest everyday scenes, the doll will eat and sleep, dress and wash - and without your help.
- Comment on your every action - first you do this, and then the child. Help your child come up with a story; at first you just collected the cubes in a truck, then he drove them. Where and why? The kid himself is unlikely to decide, tell me: the car is going to a construction site, but you can build a house out of cubes.
- The baby must understand the functions of substitute objects. It sounds complicated, but in fact, it is easy: for example, an ordinary twig can become both a spoon and a thermometer, and a simple leaf can play the role of soap or a piece of bread.
Substitute items develop imaginative thinking, but at the same time, they can “confuse” the child, and therefore do not use more than one substitute in one game. If today a cube is a chair, then let it be just that.
Example of a simple game: Once again about how to use substitute objects: you decided to feed the bunny porridge, but there was no spoon, use any stick or twig. Although, not every little one will agree to such a substitution, for example, my little son did not feed the doll with a popsicle stick, he ran to the kitchen and brought an “adult” spoon.
So, by the age of two, the baby will not only repeat the scenarios you played, but will gradually become a little director of his own games.
Two years is a kind of milestone when a child turns from an interested observer into a participant, and then into a scriptwriter of his own games. We’ll tell you further how to play with a baby after two years.
Ages from two to three years: “Mom, watch me play”
At about the age of 2 years, the baby can already occupy himself, which makes his parents very happy. Although, mom still remains an important participant. Now it’s her turn to be a spectator and sometimes a reviewer.
Purpose of the game: entertainment. It is from this age that the baby himself needs play; he “plays” and does not repeat what his mother does.
During this period, “play space” plays an important role. It’s great if the child has his own room, his own little world with toys, books and a house. The child decides for himself when to dump the entire construction set on the floor, and when it’s time to “read”, do not disturb his little “order”; the child should be the only master in his possessions.
How to play: The baby has already perfectly mastered simple game scenarios, but he has difficulty in restoring the correct sequence. Bears and bunnies wash their hands before going to bed, and before going for a walk they may mistakenly “undress”, and not vice versa. The mother’s task is to suggest how to do it correctly, but not to reshape the plot of the children’s game.
After 2.5 years, the baby himself will become a mother, a doctor, and a salesman. This new stage can be conditionally called “the time of dialogues.” Mom constantly communicates with new people who the baby imagines himself to be.
Download our checklist and find out the most interesting intellectual games for children from 2 to 5 years old!
Example of a simple game: Buy a young doctor’s kit, hang a sign on the door with the name of the “young specialist”, place “patients” in a line in the corridor, and it’s better if these are not toys, but relatives, because you can talk to them. Teach your child to “listen” to the patient and write him a prescription, tap his knees with a hammer and do everything that he sees at an appointment in the clinic.
Playing with a partner - important stage, which a child must master by the age of three. Moreover, not only parents, but also other children should be partners. Gradually involve peers in the game, show that playing together is more fun and interesting.
So, by the age of three years, the baby will feed and treat his toys, will communicate with them, use substitute objects, and also successfully “cooperate” in play with other kids.
Ages from three to four years: time for role-playing games
Has your child memorized all your dialogues, successfully repeats them and applies them, but still cannot come up with new options? Help him, without your participation the little “director” will not be born.
Purpose of the game: teach the child to be “like an adult,” and therefore now he plays the main role. Now he is not an ice cream buyer, but an ice cream seller, not a bus passenger, but its driver.
How to play: Now the child is in charge, but he thinks so; in fact, the “engine” of the game is still the adult. Help me come up with a story further, how to do this?
Example of a simple game: Let's imagine that you are playing in a kindergarten, where the child is the teacher. What should you do? Ask to eat and go for a walk, ask when classes and walks will take place. This way you can quietly tell the little teacher what to do next.
No need to tell the baby new position. He must come to this himself, and little “tricks” will help - irreplaceable attributes of any profession. Offer your little one a white coat, and he will immediately realize that he is a doctor, and a car steering wheel will instantly turn him into a driver.
Ages four to five: a game for communication
So, if your baby is already four years old, then he asks to play with him less and less, because it is much more interesting to do this with peers.
Purpose of the game: the game ceases to be an end in itself, now it is a way to communicate with friends. Although the child sometimes involves adults in the game, it is communication that is important here.
How to play: how to play with children in kindergarten - the child will figure it out on his own. But if you decide to keep your little one occupied at home, then board games will help; this is the most suitable age for lotto or dominoes. It is also worth playing outdoor games with your baby; hide and seek, for example, will cheer up the whole family.
Game example: at this age, children learn to build a dialogue with peers, and they can help with this simple game"Telephone conversation." Invite your child to talk to you on the phone, this conversation will become a “rehearsal”, and during a real conversation with friends the child will not be confused. This game is especially useful for little “silent people”, because in a telephone conversation you cannot nod your head.
Closer to the age of five, the child begins to recognize himself as a boy or a girl, this is reflected in the choice of games: the girl plays daughter-mother, and the boy imagines himself as a brave warrior.
We told you about how to play with children from birth to 5 years old, share your favorite games, how do you play with your baby?
Download the checklist "Logic and thinking games for children under 5 years old"
For a child to learn easily and strive for new knowledge with pleasure, it is important to early childhood captivate him, and the easiest way to do this is with the help of a game. Download the most interesting intellectual games for children from 2 to 5 years old!
For a child, play is the most joyful and comfortable way to learn about the world. If a child knows how to play, if he is pleased with his own dexterity and inspired by victory over difficulties, if he has learned to listen and watch carefully, he will never be bored.
The main principles of playing with a child:
- The person playing with the child should play with pleasure. When a child sees that an adult is reluctant to play with him, he thinks that “the game is not interesting, since the adult does not like it” or even worse: “it’s probably not interesting to play with me.” This is not at all what we would like.
- No need to be boring. If a child builds something and says it's a helicopter, but in your mind it looks like scrap metal, don't say it doesn't look like it. Just build the helicopter yourself the way you imagine it, and say with admiration that now you have two helicopters. And don’t offend the child, and give him a correct idea of what a helicopter looks like.
- If you play educational games with your child. There is no need to endlessly ask the child: what color is this, and how many pencils are there - if he clearly does not want to answer this, although he told you all this yesterday. But if the child does not cope with the task, then you are overestimating the level of his development. Take a break, and after a while, start with easier tasks. It’s even better if the child himself begins to choose tasks based on his capabilities. Don't rush him.
- When appears a new game, but he doesn’t want to play it the way it’s written, let him play it his own way.
- Fantasize yourself. If a child loses interest in something, it is better to revive this interest yourself, and not jump from one game to another. For example, you play cars and garages together, but the child has lost interest. And you come to the rescue: “A red car is driving and crying - where is my house, help me - I’m lost.” The child will immediately become interested and will put not only cars in the garage, but also put all the other toys in their places.
- Teach your child to fantasize. Even from simple cubes you can make a motor ship, imagining that it is food or firewood for a picnic. Drawing is also a reason to teach a child to fantasize. For example, a child paints yellow, he himself does not know what he is drawing. Help him: “Oh, what a big orange. There will be enough for all your friends.” And cut out a large circle from this painted sheet. IN next time blue strokes will become rain or snowfall, etc.
- There are no games just for girls or just for boys. A child should have all kinds of games, regardless of gender: dolls, cars, construction sets, etc.
- Give your child what interests him most. There are children who have a “mania”, for example, to play only with cars or only with dolls. Okay, use your imagination. You can “go” to the store by car. You can “go” to the zoo with the doll.
- Toys must be stored carefully. If the blocks are scattered, dolls are broken, tights and socks are lying among the toys, then the child, looking at the closet, will definitely not want to play. The child must be taught to store things neatly. It is better to spend time and put things in order together with the child in the form of a game: “Who will collect the toys faster?”, “Who will collect the most cubes,” etc.
- Don't buy your child a toy on a whim. Teach your child to dream about the desired toy and wait for it to appear in your nursery. This expectation trains the will and reduces impulsive behavior. An abundance of toys disorients the child, leading to absent-mindedness, whims, and overexcitement. With unnecessary abundance, the value of even useful toys decreases. The child’s joy from acquiring new toys disappears; he throws away the old ones without grief.
- Carry out an “inspection” more often - remove some of the toys from time to time, and then give them to the child again. An old forgotten toy will be joyfully perceived as new.
- A toy is a baby's first property. Do not dispose of your child’s toys yourself - under no circumstances throw away your child’s favorite toy, even if it is already in an unsightly state! Do not throw a broken toy into the trash in front of the child, put it away without the child noticing.
- Toys can be different types: entertaining, educational, sports, construction, technical, musical, creative - and all of them are needed for the harmonious development of the child’s personality. If a child already has two entertaining toys (a spinning top, a jumping frog), then it is better to buy an educational toy (construction set, blocks) or a creative one (coloring book, finger puppet). However, one must take into account age characteristics child. Don't force him to do anything he doesn't like.
- Many modern toys, despite their technical complexity, do not contribute to the development of a child’s creative abilities. Children manipulate them (wind them up, start them up, press buttons to produce a special light or sound effect), rather than play. They do not develop the child, but inhibit development and form primitive thinking
- Buy a toy if it evokes positive feelings in your child. The expressions on the toy's eyes and face should be friendly and positive. The eyes should not be half-closed - this is an expression of illness, sadness, depression. The toy's face should be neutral, without strong emotions. It is unacceptable to purchase a toy that conveys negative attitudes towards evil, destruction, death, cruelty, attack, destruction.
- Among the positive toys there may be 1-2 negative ones (Baba Yaga, Koschey) - they are necessary for a sense of reality in role-playing games and when acting out fairy tales. In an “evil” toy, the feeling of negativity should be created through clothing and appearance, and not through an evil, frightening facial expression.
- Parents want their child to play independently... Take your time! The baby doesn't really like to play on his own. First of all, he just wants to be with you. Secondly, playing alone is not very interesting. But a child who has been taught to play will definitely learn to play independently.
- From 3 to 4 years old, children's favorite games are role-playing games. The child takes on a certain role, posing as mom and dad, and exactly repeats the pose, gestures, facial expressions, and speech. Therefore, in the presence of a child, pay attention to your behavior, your speech, gestures, etc.
Remember: now no one officially controls the quality of toys, and toys that are prohibited in other countries on moral grounds are entering Russia. Therefore, you, parents, have an increased responsibility.
We, mothers, have to think about different things - what to feed, what to dress, how to protect, how to teach, and so on. It is not surprising that the question of how to play with a child sometimes does not even arise - it is not time for that. There are also household chores, and some have work. And we’re too young to spend hours playing car service or making endless donuts for doll tea parties. Boring!
But it turns out that “playing for hours” is not at all necessary, but playing with the child at least a little, but fully and enthusiastically, is simply necessary. It is necessary for the harmonious development of the baby’s personality, for the formation of trusting and fulfilling child-parent relationships, and also so that the playing mother can fully experience the joy of motherhood.
Today, almost every mother knows that play is natural for an early and preschool age a way of understanding the world and interacting with others. We can say that the baby does not play at every minute of his life - he just lives like that. But at this “celebration of life”, adult “aunts” often feel out of place. The game “doesn’t work”, everything said sounds unnatural, looks ridiculous, and you want to quickly run to the saving soup on the stove or ironing - just to come up with a reason for yourself not to participate in games with the baby.
There are many reasons why a mother may not be interested in playing with her child - from “difficult childhood” to unloved husband. But let's not engage in psychoanalysis, but let's talk about simple techniques, which can help every mother play out.
The game is anything
First of all, you need to abandon stereotypical views on the child’s play and the role of the mother in this game. You shouldn’t try to entertain your child non-stop and take on the responsibility of always being ready to offer interesting game or engage your baby in some educational activity.
Firstly, the child has a dad, grandparents, etc., who can perfectly play with him in the most different games. Secondly, the baby has toys and a natural need for independent play. Thirdly, a child’s understanding of play is significantly different from yours. And if for you this is some kind of specially organized activity that has a beginning and an end, a certain plot and rules, then for a child almost any time spent together will be a game, be it reading a book or preparing dinner with four hands, board game or general cleaning.
You shouldn't and can't play all day long, sitting on a carpet surrounded by railways and cities made of cubes. But you can play with your child almost from morning to evening, including him as a full participant in your “adult games” - household chores.
Walls help
Sometimes it is difficult for a mother to start playing with her child due to the inconvenient organization of space. Take your mind back to any kindergarten or development center. How is the play space organized there? What toys are there and how are they located? It’s convenient and easy to play with your child when everything is at hand, when, following the development of the game’s plot, you can easily include new characters and objects in the game without having to look for them on the mezzanine.
The space should be conducive for mother and child to play both physically (comfortable, accessible, all toys are clearly visible) and psychologically (cozy, calm, pleasant, joyful).
Have you noticed how time flies when you are truly passionate about something? Maybe it was a two-hour conversation with a friend, Sunday shopping, or pleasant “minutes” watching your favorite TV series. Time flies by, and you get carried away and get involved in the process when nothing distracts you.
Therefore, the key rule for a non-boring game with a child is the absence of distractions. Moreover, it is important not only to put down the phone and turn off the TV, but also to “turn off” the carousel of thoughts in your head that are not related to the game process. You can “play” with your child for hours, scrolling through your friend feed or planning a vacation, and leave the game devastated, tired and irritated, and as a “bonus” you get a capricious child who requires increased attention. Or you can make a little effort on yourself and give your child your undivided time for 15 minutes.
Matter of habit
If at first it will be difficult to fully engage in the game and it will still be boring, this is normal. When you play in an environment conducive to this and are completely focused on the game, sooner or later you will get involved in the game and become seriously interested in the fate of the car that was damaged in a toy accident and what outfit your daughter’s favorite doll will choose for a walk today. The habit of playing is a wonderful thing that will help you both in a specific game (for example, when you started playing without the mood), and in general - every day it will become easier for you to come up with games and develop a plot, captivate your child’s play and get carried away yourself.
Source of inspiration
Even the most playful moms need a little extra inspiration sometimes. Some find it in books, some in creativity, some on the Internet. Each method is good in its own way. It is important to find one that will inspire you, awaken your Creative skills and fuel the desire to play with the child. For example, you can find a couple of interesting sites about playing with children or join a community of mothers who share stories about their activities with their kids. The most important thing is not to get stuck at the stage of contemplation, but every day to move on to creative activity, that is, to the practice of playing with your own child.
Favorite and not so favorite games
Does your child have favorite games? You can have them too - just like unloved ones. Sometimes such “dislike” can be easily corrected by simply organizing the time or space of the game. For example, you may not like to play role-playing games in the presence of other adults, but you cope well with this task one on one with your child. Or you don’t like reading in the morning because you haven’t really woken up yet, but you willingly do it at other times of the day.
But there are also games that you just don't like. There is no need to go against your preferences - most likely, not only you will be bored during such a game, because children subtly sense our mood and often model it. Ditch the games you don't like and replace them with others you enjoy. If these games are loved by your child, or you consider them necessary for his development, organize them differently - for example, ask your husband to play this game or invite a friend and child to visit.
The easiest way to play with pleasure and interest is to stop comparing yourself to others and demanding too much from yourself. You don't have to try to be your child's best playmate - you already are! Just allow yourself to take a break from the roles of mother, wife, housewife and tune in to the same wavelength as your child - at least for 15 minutes a day. What if you like it?
We should start with the fact that child psychologists distinguish several stages of development play activity in kids. The first stage lasts up to 2.5-3 years. The second stage is up to 5 years. The third stage is up to 6 years. What games can you play with your child, based on his age and development of gaming interest? What nuances should parents consider? We read about this further.
Ladushki
It’s good when children up to one year old pay enough attention to nursery rhymes several times a day, because this is the child’s first game.
Bringing toys to life
Around 10 months, dolls, cars, Stuffed Toys. The child must be shown how to play with the toy. At the same time, it is important to do everything emotionally so that the child feels your attitude towards the toy. We do the same actions with the toy as with the child, the toys come to life (the same actions happen to them as if they were alive). Then we let the child play with the toy as well.
There is no item, but this does not interfere
When the child has already learned to play with the doll (puts him to bed, rolls him around, bathes him), he can move on to another play activity. We begin to use an object that does not exist.
For example, we feed a doll and take it from an empty bowl, as if it were porridge, and hand it to the toy. There is no porridge itself, but we mean that it is there.
You can start such games at 1 year - 1 year 3 months. At first, the child may not understand, he will begin to try the empty spoon himself, rather than feed the doll, but in the future he will understand and begin to feed the toy. Then you can complicate the actions (stir the porridge, blow on it). And the child will understand that the object is not there, but this does not stop him from playing.
The next stage is when the child begins to understand the substitution of real objects.
You can take a cube and imagine that it is a mug. We feed the doll, drink from the cube ourselves, and offer the child to drink from the cube. The child slowly begins to understand that any object can be replaced.
When you have carried out a simple play action with your child, replacing a real object, invite the child to wash the clothes of the toys, but for this you need a basin. If the child does not understand that the object can be replaced, then he will run for a real basin, but if he understands, he will look around and find some object that looks like a basin. The child is already starting a game where another object is used instead of a real basin, and as if there is water, although in reality there is not.
After this, the range of games expands greatly, because any action can be somehow replaced. The only thing is that in the first stages the child himself will not come up with any new game actions or new objects, but will play what he was taught. But you shouldn’t replace too many things at once in one game; it’s very difficult for a child (it’s better to replace one or two items at a time).
When you decide to replace something in the game, be sure to tell your child about it (a cube will be a mug, a stick will be a spoon, etc.) so that the child accepts this game technique.
Without details
Next stage. It’s not just the actions themselves that become important to the child (giving a drink to a doll; previously, for a child it was like pouring water, bringing toys to the mouth, turning them over, putting the mug back, i.e. the action was carried out as accurately as possible, with details), but the plot is more interesting. There comes a time when he wants to make as many storylines as possible, some plot points, rather than just actions with details. The child switches to the plot and is ready for this plot to become more complex and continue further.
The child is unlikely to be able to master all these stages on his own, so the child must first be shown and then stimulated. You show the child how to play, and then step aside for a while and watch the child play on his own. Then you connect again and show what else you can come up with to continue playing. Thus, the child will independently learn to play a role-playing game, in addition, he will independently master the play behavior that you showed him.
Where to get stories
The simplest children's poems work very well. You can read a poem, take any toy and play out the plot.
We take the toy, shake it off, and tell the child that the doll got wet in the rain. We invite the child to wipe the toy with a towel, give him tea, and put him to bed. It turns out a new action will take care of those who get wet in the rain.
We put several toys to sleep, and only one toy will not want to sleep and will be capricious.
You build a path along which the bull walks. You can tell where is he going goby. Play how he walked along the bridge and fell.
Coming up with a new game action
You show your child a new play action, for example, how you roll a doll. Leave the child for 5 minutes and he will do the same. He most likely won’t come up with anything of his own. But a certain moment comes, and the child begins to come up with some kind of game action himself, adds detail to the game, and tries to somehow diversify it.
The child takes on a role
From 2-2.5 years old, children are ready to take on some role. IN early age this is also possible, but when you yourself offer to turn into someone, and the child agrees, and you play. But, most likely, he won’t come up with it himself. And if he plays some role, he does it not yet consciously. It happens that the child himself offers a role, but does not know what to do with this role. In this situation, it is worth getting involved in the game with the child and telling him what can be done in this role, offering as many different actions as possible.
Role-playing speech and play with peers
Role speech is when a child can identify himself. Often, when children start playing with peers, it happens that one wants to play one thing, the other wants to play another. It happens that when starting to play, children do not know anything about the role of the person with whom they are playing, so they cannot yet agree on who they are in the game, and do not know how to do it.
If a child does not play with his peers, then you can start teaching him together with an adult. An adult can take on a role, making sure to designate it. Help the child identify his role and agree on how the game will take place.
Role-playing speech can be developed even without manipulating any objects, playing only with words.
Free play behavior
Free play behavior appears by the age of 4-4.5 years. The child can already speak for other objects, for example, for a doll. The child can already come up with a role for himself, can figure out how to deploy a certain sequence of actions in this role, can accept another person into his game and interact with him, i.e. understand his role.
And the tasks of parents at this stage:
After five years, 3 stages begin
- Role reversal.
- Connecting roles.
- Fantasizing.
The easiest way to learn is through fairy tales, when the heroes of the fairy tales do not have very detailed actions. (For example, first the child is Little Red Riding Hood, and you are a wolf, a minute later you are a grandmother, and the child is a wolf, etc.) So, without stretching the role itself, but quickly changing it, the child begins to learn to change the role depending on what is happening .
It is important to show the child how you can combine 2 different roles in the game (for example, one is fairy-tale and the other is real). After a certain time, the child himself will begin to figure out how to combine some roles, especially if they are quite different. This is already creative work, and shows that the child is already at a fairly high level of play activity.
Sometimes it happens that a child has mastered all the previous stages of gaming activity, but still the plots of the games are not very rich. The same can be observed in creativity and in inventing fairy tales.
Help here scheme for inventing fairy tales. Any fairy tale is built from several semantic blocks:
Fixation of the initial shortage, i.e. something is missing (for example, the king lacks the firebird and he sends Ivan to get it).
Meeting of the hero with the donor of the magic remedy (the hero begins to look for the missing element and meets some kind of wizard).
The hero receives a magical remedy from this donor, which will subsequently help him (a flying carpet, a ball of thread, etc.)
Meeting of the hero with the enemy.
The main test is the fight against the enemy.
The hero's victory is his receipt of the desired object.
Return of the hero and receipt of the reward.
It is important not to come up with a fairy tale for your child yourself, but to start inventing it and stop at some point. Next is the child’s turn, he offers something of his own. Not all children immediately turn on, in this case you continue to talk. At some point, the child will also start making things up. It is important to remind you that you come up with it together, and not he alone. A child can take all the initiative into his own hands, but he needs to learn to hear the other person.
After you have come up with a fairy tale, you transfer everything to the action and start a new game.
Answers on questions
He takes a glass of water, pours it into a bowl of soup and starts splashing it with his hands. On the one hand, the child is busy research activities, on the other hand, it happens at the table during meals. In this situation, it is better to sit the child on the floor, give him a pot of potatoes and a glass of water, but not the soup itself, and let the child play with it and satisfy all his research needs. But at the table there are clear boundaries, at the table we don’t do that. If this is not explained to the child at an early age, then at 3-4 years old he may simply start throwing plates on the floor, turning over a plate of food, reaching into someone else’s plate, etc.
Development can also go in parallel with the ability to behave normally in a team. If a person is smart, developed, creative, knows how to experiment, has unconventional thinking, this does not necessarily have to be a pig who cannot behave at the table.
Another example, the child deliberately throws food. In this situation, we first tell him that he can’t do this, but if the child quits again, then we finish the meal. There are certain rules of behavior at the table that need to be explained to the child, and sometimes even several times.
You need to give the game some kind of plot and at some point they will withdraw themselves. Show the child the main stages, understand whether he knows how to replace objects, whether he knows how to arrange a play space, whether he knows how to negotiate with peers. Observe all this, if something doesn’t work out, then work on it, beat it. And in the future, try to set a general outline, and then go about your business and see if it works or not, if you need to get involved at some point. There is nothing wrong if you also play with your child for a long time, but it is important that you do not play for the child, and that the child does not watch you as you play, because The child in this situation will have little independent play, which means slow development of this play activity.
In this case, it is not necessary to go to a speech therapist. But if a child at this age has problems with speech, he speaks only in words, does not speak in sentences, then something needs to be done. If the speech is understandable, the child makes sentences, composes questions, answers them, and fully understands everything, then you can start working with sounds after 4 years, closer to five. Letters "R", "L" after 5 years.
If, for example, you simply write that you and your child will work on speech, without thinking through how exactly you will do this, then most likely you will not work on speech.
Around a year or so, there is a moment when it would be good for a child to establish relationships not only with his mother, but to begin to understand that there are other adults too, and somehow learn to interact with them. This does not mean that the child should be given to a nanny and the mother should go to work, but it would be good to be away, about once a week for some period (you can start with an hour). Before you leave, be sure to say goodbye to your child.
The first option, the mother decides how and with whom she will play, but not the children (first I play this game with one, and then I play with the other). The second option, the mother invites the children to agree: either we play together and discuss how we will play, or you agree with which of you I will play first and with whom later. While the children negotiate, you go about your business.
This is not always possible. At the same time, a role-playing game works well when one and the other have their own role. Mom can help combine these roles, perform a combination of roles, and even take on some role.
Creativity can also come together. To do this, take a large sheet of paper, lay it on the floor, and lay out the paints. At the same time, everyone sits in their corner and draws something according to their capabilities. It is not always possible to divide some intellectual activities so that it is interesting for both one and the other at the same moment in time, so it is better not to try to combine them into one thing.
We need to help the child diversify the game. Add additional roles, additional role-playing activities. At the same time, introduce the same character and show what he can do. Set up a play space, and the role-playing game will most likely begin to develop.
You can teach something with the help of some favorite characters. For example, Superman must be able to do everything. The child does not want to do exercises, but a superman must be physically developed, he must be able to do pull-ups. Superman must be able to read, play out what will happen to him if he cannot read. And this way you can beat any skills.
Plots change simply, i.e. the child was conditionally first Superman, and then became Batman, and everything else remained the same. Or it’s the complexity of the plot that changes. Try to evaluate the game from the point of view of the stages of development of gaming activity (see above in the article), i.e. whether complications begin to appear (combining roles, adding parallel roles), whether the child can connect many sequential actions in the plot. All this should gradually appear.
Regarding skills: If a child loves to draw, then even if he holds the brush incorrectly, you should not be upset about it, because sooner or later there will be a leap in development, and the child will reach a new level. It’s another matter when a child doesn’t want to draw at all. Here you can think about organizing space, about imagining, about how to come up with something new with your child. Try to introduce new stories not only into games, but also into creativity.
It is impossible to accurately divide the list of skills by age, what exactly a child should be able to do at a certain age. On the one hand, knowledge of age norms is good, on the other hand, you need to pay attention to. The mistake is that parents begin to abruptly teach skills that a child on average should do at this age, but in fact this skill is not yet in his zone of proximal development. These skills, of course, need to be developed, but gradually, not in leaps and bounds.
There are children who are highly sensitive both internally and externally, this is a certain feature of their temperament. You need to express your emotions, and it’s normal to feel angry, sad, etc., but you need to be able to express them. Agree with your child on how he will express his emotions. For example, you can beat or throw a pillow, you can lie down on the floor, or you can agree that it’s okay to scatter your things, but then after a while he will need to collect them. But you cannot hit another person or yourself in a fit of emotion; you need to explain to the child that this is not how to express your resentment, and offer another way to express your negative emotions.
It is necessary to clearly indicate to the child that the younger brother or sister is your child and you decide how to interact with him. This is not the common property of your family, it is specifically your child and you decide when to feed him. The same is true if the older child tries to annoy the younger one. Explain to the older child that youngest child yours, and you don’t allow anyone to touch your child like that, including him.
You need to accept the child, tell him that it’s really not pleasant when something doesn’t work out. Show how you can express your sadness (for example, lie quietly). And when the child calms down:
a) remember with him some of his other things that didn’t work out before, but are now working out;
b) tell us your examples of what didn’t work for you already in adult life, but now it works. Remember stories from your childhood.
If a person constantly has the thought that he did not succeed, but then succeeded, then the child, most likely, will not give up the work he started, but will see it to the end. If this was not the case, then the child can easily give up what he started, if, on top of everything, he has not yet had experience in overcoming any difficulties.
Most likely, during these games, firstly, there is an emotional release, an outburst. Secondly, there is the joy of communicating with a brother or sister. Therefore, such games cannot be completely excluded; it’s another matter if they become bad, when children can no longer get out of this state, in which case it is better to switch them to something calm.
