Children from one year to three years often extermined, and such behavior causes concern to parents. Too emotional reaction of the child, during which he cries loudly, shouts, and sometimes she tears his hair, has causes. If they know and properly react to an excited state, the tantrum at the baby is 3 years old can be warned. Will help parents cope with the problem of psychologist tips.
What is hysterics?
The hysterical fit or hysteria, as they are called in the people, is an excited state, during which the child flies loudly, shouts, it hits the legs, scatters things. The hysteria can begin with crying, and go into laughter and will end with convulsions. The hysterical seizure appears when the baby cannot cope with rolling offensive or emotions. The hysteria occurs involuntarily and is expressed by characteristic symptoms.
Signs of hysterical seas:
- loud cry without any requirements;
- violation of the perception of the reality of the external world;
- motor Activity (scattering of things, topman legs, riding on the floor, scratching facial, shots);
- low pain threshold;
- long and loud sobs and sobs;
- laugh;
- convulsions;
- loss of consciousness;
- exhausted condition at the very end.
As a rule, small children resort to hysterics to attract the attention of parents. However, such a state has other reasons. It must be remembered that the hysteria is natural because they still have a imperfect nervous system, and they cannot say what they want.
It should be distinguished by hysteria from children's whims. The capricious kid crying and shouts specifically in the presence of adults, wanting to get a toy, candy from them, or attract attention. Capricians have their own reasons - so the children show character and seek to defend their "I".
Caprises and hysteria deliver a lot of trouble to parents. However, it must be remembered that everything will soon pass and the condition of the baby is normalized. The child will soon learn the words to express his feelings and say that he wants. True, so far needed to be patient and learn to adequately react to the excited state of the baby. After all, if it is wrong to raise him, get rid of hysterics in the future it will be impossible.
Causes of hysterics in children from 1 to 6 years
At the age of one year to six years, children often have hysterics. They appear not from scratch. Externally, hysterical seizures look spontaneous, but they have their own reasons. One-year-old kid can cry, if his mother does not change the wet pants in time, and hysteriate, if he wants to get the desired toy.
The most common causes of hysterics are:
- the desire to attract the attention of adults;
- inability to express in words his discontent;
- insult, indignation;
- the desire to receive something from adults;
- feeling of hunger, overwork;
- general painful state during some disease;
- reaction to pain;
- the act of the child remained unnoticed and he wants approval;
- weak nervous system, wounded by the psyche.
The hysterics of the child up to 1 year to 2 years appear if he wants to eat, drink, sleep, or his stomach hurts. Children can sob even after their desire is fulfilled and there is no reason to cry. If the baby has wet tights or he is very tired, playing for a long time, his hysteria can also begin.
The older child, the more consciously he has hysterical seizures. Children begin to understand that their crying makes parents react to their desires. Small manipulators start specifically to rush hysterics when they want to express disagreement or protest.
The transitional and turning stage in the physiological and psycho-emotional development of the child occurs in 3 years. At this age, children beat in hysterics when they want to insist on their own. Sibling specifically comes to parents: he is asked to dress, and he undresses, or his name is, and he runs away. By doing this way, children do not want to raise parents at all. They simply do not know how to compromise and do not know another way to achieve the desired result. Children at this age are offended and vintage. Sometimes they specifically make adults with their cry, when they want to revenge for something.
If parents are too spoiled. At this age, children can already explain the words that they want. If instead of explanations they rush hysterics, then they want to force adults to act in any way. Parents, wanting to calm the capricious child, go about the little manipulator and do everything as he wants.
If at the older age, the child often flows into hysterics without any reason, it means that he has a too weak nervous system. In the state of the nervous attack, children suffocate from crying, they blush, they begin vomiting, convulsions appear, they fall on the floor from exhaustion or from losing consciousness. In such cases, you need to refer to the pediatrician or neurologist.
How to warn the development of hysterics?
If adults want to cope with hysteria, they need to closely monitor the behavior and emotional state of the baby and try to prevent cry and crying. It's impossible to make a completely forcing the child. However, you can reduce the frequency of hysterical seizures.
How to prevent hysterics:
- in time feed the baby, stick to the routine of the day, prevent overwork, laying sleeping in the day;
- prepare a kid to the upcoming new situation, interest to a toy or promise to buy something;
- it is understood that the daughter or son wants, to react on time to his desires (let me eat, change the wet tights);
- give the baby more freedom, allow him to choose his clothes to himself, go for breakfast;
- to spend more time with your baby, love it, read fairy tales, play games with him.
Parents are able to prevent the development of hysteria from their baby, because they are the main individuals in the life of the child. His whims at this age are always repelled from the desire to attract the attention of adults or make them act in their own interests.
How to react to hysterics?
If a child has begun a hysterical attack, parents cannot cut on it. Often adults begin to shout on babies and even beat them, which is strictly prohibited. There are many ways to help your child calm down.
How to behave to parents during the children's hysteria:
- take a kid with an interesting toy, switch his attention to some exciting occupation;
- avoid crisis moments, do not feed the unloved porridge, do not wear an ugly cap;
- do not shout, do not argue, do not explain, do not persuade, but ignore screams and crying;
- go to another room, because the hysteria "loves" viewers;
- ask the child that he wants;
- patiently to transfer children's whims and try not to break off;
- do not shout, but sorry the baby, stroke him on the head and sympathize.
Children's crying has its reasons, he arises if a small child is offended with something, I do not agree with something or did not receive something. When the baby is in an offended state, it is impossible to scream at him, because it can only be aggravated by the situation and harm the child's psyche. The child is unable to understand that adults act in his interests. Parents should calm the baby as quickly as possible and climb it.
Experienced psychotherapists know how to cope with children's whims and hysterical attacks. For many years, specialists are watching the behavior of children. They know how to act in the crisis situation. Tips of psychologists will help parents to cope with hysterical attacks in children. Specialists in the field of children's psychology recommend adults do not panic, take into hand, act consistently and in the interests of the child.
How to deal with hysteria:
- Ask the baby why he cries. If the child does not know how to speak or does not know what to answer, take it in the hands and calm down.
- Find out the cause of child crying. If the baby does not want to eat oatmeal, offer him a semolina. If he is wet, move it into dry lingerie.
- If the child hysteriate, because he wants a new toy, you need to distract his attention to another subject.
- If the hysteria is caused by the desire to take revenge on the adult, it is necessary to ignore children's crying and go to another room. The baby calms down when I realize that there was no one playing a performance.
- If the demands of the child are unfairny, it is impossible to give up to him or to meet his desire. It is better to try to distract the baby from the subject or situation that caused the cry. It is necessary to transfer it to another object.
During the hysteria, it makes no sense to prove something or explain the child. He is in too swollen state to understand what adults tell him or quickly calm down. The child should be spoiled, after a while he gets tired of shy and becomes calm.
What to do after tantrum?
If the baby has a hysterical attack, and he calmed down, you can talk to him. Parents must give to understand the child that he behaves wrong. It is necessary to quietly talk to the baby and find out why he cried. During the conversation, adults must say that they still love their child, but his behavior is very sad.
Parents need to teach the baby to behave correctly in a situation, during which he wants to cry. Adults on specific examples should show the child as he should behave. For example, if the kid wants a banana, he must say about this mom, but not cry. If he wants to the street, you also need to tell my desire to parents.
If the kid's desires are clear, but they cannot perform adults, it is necessary to promise a child some alternative. For example, if he wants a fire truck, you can promise him to buy this toy later, somewhere next week or instead of it to offer a police robot.
The famous pediatrician Evgeny Komarovsky recommends that the parents do not show children that child crying touches them. Only for those adults who react to their cries and make everything they want or ask. The child will not have to have to be hooked in front of a washing machine or TV, he cries only for mom and dad, when he wants something to achieve something.
It is not recommended to ensure children's crying gifts. The kid will realize that with the help of tears he can all achieve and wake regularly. Evgeny Komarovsky does not advise to give way to the whims of the baby. Parents should not be given to him to manipulate.
Adults must act solidarly. If the dad told "no", the mother or grandmother should adhere to the same opinion. It is impossible to teach a child to achieve the desired test for the strength of the nerves of all relatives.
According to Evgenia Komarovsky, during the hysterics you need to put a child in a playpen or another safe place and get out of the room. For a while, the baby will cry, but when it will understand that he is alone, and no one hears him, he calms down. After all, the performance is designed for viewers.
True, this method of combating children's whims requires the parents of steel nerves. Not any mom can safely listen to children's crying. It will take place a little time and the child will understand at the level of reflexes that as soon as he screams, he remains alone and the situation worsens. The kid will hold back and will behave calmly.
How to punish a child after 4 years?
If children after four years continue to test, psychologists recommend punishing them. At this age, the baby understands that he behaves wrong. However, he deliberately exists parents and surrounding with their whims.
How to punish kid:
- shout on it;
- threaten that he will remain without sweet, he will not buy a toy;
- because of bad behavior, prohibit him to watch cartoons;
- put the baby in the corner, preliminarily explaining to him, for which he is punished.
You can not beat, insult the child or give him funny, offensive nicknames, for example, to say that he is a swax. Thus, you can apply the baby's faster psyche serious afterwards it will become aggressive or, on the contrary, will be closed in himself. In adulthood, he can develop complexes, and all due to the fact that in childhood he lacked parental caress and love.
In what cases do you need to contact a psychologist?
To cope with children's hysteria, all parents can independently. It is only necessary to keep yourself in your hands, do not shout on the crying baby and not to rush to perform all his whims.
To seek help from a children's psychologist in such cases:
- hysterical seizures happened regularly several times a day;
- after the attack, the kid appears shortness of breath, vomiting, convulsions, he loses consciousness, his clone to sleep;
- baby traums himself and others;
- phobia appears at the child, he has nightmare nightmares.
To four years, children must stop tools. At this age, they already know how to speak, and can express their dissatisfaction with words or explain adults that they want. If the kid's four years old is still crying and shouts, it means that he has a nervous disorder that requires treatment from a specialist.
Prevention of hysteria
Hysterical seizures in children need to try to prevent. It is important not to bring the situation to scream and crying. It should be known in advance, in what cases the baby will be capricious, and try to avoid similar moments. If the child is always crying in the store of children's toys, you need to avoid visiting such institutions. If the baby begins to hide when mom is talking to someone on the street, you need to take it with a game in a sandbox or suggest him to ride the carousel, and then talk with friends.
Methods for preventing children's hysterics:
- do not overwrite the baby, dosing physical exertion, laying sleeping on time;
- allow the watch only calm, in which there are no frightening special effects;
- do not allow grandparents to pour a child and indulge in all his whims;
- carefully follow the children's reaction, if he starts to hone, quickly find out what the cause of discontent;
- teach the baby to play with dolls or machine, so it will be constantly busy;
- give the baby freedom, allow him to dress independently, hairstyle;
- before putting the child to sleep, turn off the TV or pick it out of the sandbox, you need to warn it several times;
- conduct as much time with the baby, play with him, caress, love and take care of him.
However, if a child, despite all the efforts of the parents, begins to have to have to have to reassure and pretend that his tears will not change the decision of adults. If you react to the cry of the baby, as he is waiting, wants and desires, the number of hysterics will only increase. Small children will always try to achieve the desired with the help of tears.
However, it must be remembered that no child can do without crying. With the help of screams and tears, the baby expresses his emotions. After all, in infancy, he can not tell you that he does not like or somehow cope with the situation unpleasant for him. True, at this age, the child does not know how to objectively assess the environment or the situation and weighing decisions. Parents should not fulfill all the desires of the child, because many of them can harm him.
Rising children, you need to be patient. Before punishing the child, you should think about everything well. Any incorrect action of parents can bring irreparable harm to the baby's psyche. Problems in child behavior may arise later, for example, at school age or in adulthood. If the child correctly educate, based on the recommendations of psychologists, many difficulties can be avoided.
If nevertheless, children's problems were "smeared", forgotten, and further turned into serious psychological problems of an adult - urgently to a specialist. Psychologist-hypnologist
Hysteria in a child is not such a rare phenomenon. They are a manifestation of severe nervousness and are accompanied by uncontrolled behavior with the loss of self-control. The tantrum at the kid arises suddenly, and how often the parents consider, unfortunately. Let's separate in more detail why hysterics have 3 years old, psychologist tips will also consider on this issue.
What could be the causes
Most often, children's hysteries can be observed between the ages of the year to four years. They pass in the form of a strong crying, shouting. At the same time, the child falls on the floor and rides on it, waving his hands and knocks his legs. It is quite rare, but some kids may have a convulsive syndrome when he is arodified. At this point, he does not have the ability to adequately evaluate the situation, and no conversations and other ways to calm it help.
Many psychologists believe that the manifestations of hysterics are one of the ways of manipulation. And if mom or father tries at this moment to please to stop such a phenomenon, then it will continue again and again.
The causes of hysterics in a child for 3 years and younger are usually as follows:
- Appeal attention. Especially often this happens when parents are constantly forced to spend time at work, or after the birth of the younger brother or sister. So that such a situation does not occur, you need to talk to him, and try to give a little longer.
- He wants to achieve the desired - buying toys, a gift, or something else. This can often be observed in the store, when mom refuses to acquire the desired one. It is possible to prevent this only if you agree with the baby in advance, to a shopping trip, which will be bought, and what is not. And adhere to a strictly established arrangement.
- The child does not know how to express his negative attitude in conversation by ordinary words. Therefore, it is recommended to go to the conversation more often with him, teach it to normal communication.
- The hysteria can be the result of a bad feel of feeling of the baby as a result of the disease, overwork, overheating or freezing. It happens in the case when he wants to sleep or hungry. This is usually happening for the youngest children when the parents are roughly violating the routine of the day, while the karapuz is strongly tired. So, for example, if you do not put it in time and extend the time of wakefulness per hour or two, then overexcitation arises against the background of fatigue and infants falls asleep with hysteria.
- Such behavior may be a consequence of the poor state of the nervous system if the baby is often punished, they beat it or shout. A hyperopine can lead to the same result when the mother does not give the baby to make even one step alone, and is in a state of constant anxiety.
- As a reason for the sudden occurrence of hysterics attacks, the birth of a second child is also called, the divorce of the parents, the death of close people, holding the first days outside the house (with a nanny or in kindergarten).
- When a hysteria occurs in a child of 4 years, then this is a very unpleasant signal to the fact that in the family is not all safe. This age is characterized by the fact that the son or daughter begins to imitate adults. Therefore, you need to try to parents so that there are no scandals in the house, and all the problems solve in a conversation.
- The reason for the appearance of an inadequate reaction can be the absence of a clear reaction of parents on the positive and negative behavior of the Karapus, as well as the incorrectly established system of promotions and punishments.
- In some cases, hysteria attacks may arise due to violations in the work of the baby's nervous system, or the disease.
- Sometimes hysteria occurs if the child is engaged in an exciting game or other pleasant things for himself, and his mother or dad at that moment he is beginning to distract, or roughly interrupt the process.
- Most often, hysterics are noted at the age of three. At this age, psychologists have a crisis, which is characterized by the emergence of severe stubbornness and negativism towards parents. A small person begins to take stubbornness, not approaching the call, undress if it is dressed. This is due to the inability to compromise. Having obtained the desired by rolling the hysteria, the baby will repeat it every time again.
Faced with this for the first time, adults are lost, and do not know how to react correctly in this situation. Normal desire for any parent is attempting to stop children's hysteria, and after - to prevent the development of a new attack. With proper behavior and reaction to such a phenomenon, it is quite possible, and in most cases, proper behavior and reaction helps to solve the problem once and for all, without resorting to the help of a specialist.
What do we have to do
In order to stop hysteria there are many ways. Here are some of them that indicate how to deal with the hysteries of the child.
Interruption in the second stage
Usually hysterics occurs in three stages. On the first, the baby goes crawled, while not noticing others. On the second, he begins motor arousal, and he grabs all items that come under hand, it falls on the floor. Then the sobs begin. Most often, if the parent will go to another room at the second stage, and will not pay attention to the baby, then the hysteria stops. In the case when the Karapuz has already come in sobbing, it should be hugging, regret. He calms down, relax and wants to sleep a little.
Prevention
In the case when one- or a two-year-old child is constantly hysteria, this phenomenon is recommended to prevent, not allowing its development. With the slightest capricious, the baby needs to distract on something interesting for him. It is necessary to try to understand what irritation causes him, and eliminate it. This technique helps well only when used at the very beginning. When the attack in full swing does not make sense.
For older children
If there is a hysteria in a child for 3 years what to do. At this age and older, he already understands the meaning of speech. Therefore, parents should talk to him, explaining that such a way of behavior will not bring the desired result, and does not affect the receipt of the desired one. It is best to say to a soft tone that mom or dad understand why this happens, but in fact it will not help. In order for you to hear all your desires, you need to try quietly.
After that, the child should remain alone so that he had an understanding of the uselessness of such behavior. If the hysterical occurred on the street, it is best to take the baby to the place where there are no people, that is, isolate it from any reaction around.
If a child of 2 years is constantly hysteriate the advice of a psychologist about this is the following:
- With any occurrence of hysteria, it is necessary to behave equally calmly and slightly removed. This will allow the baby to understand the uselessness of the scream in solving his problem.
- It is necessary every time in the period of calm, explain that the problem should be solved only by a calm conversation, and another method will not bring effect.
- After the attack, do not remind of it in any way, and even more so constantly comment on the current situation.
- Under any circumstances, an adult must behave calmly and show maximum patience.
- It should not be anger in response to such a son or daughter's behavior, since if he or she wants to pay attention to himself, and you give them the desired, only with the "minus" sign.
Psychologists say that in the case when the hysteria has become a frequent manifestation due to the wrong reaction to not parents, do not expect an instant result after the first calm conversation. In order for a new behavior model to be fixed, it is necessary for a while. As a rule, everything passes on their own by four years, but in case of continuing such behavior in 4-5 years, the reason should be sought in the wrong behavior of close people. This is especially true of grandparents who often pokak the kids and provoke them to further negative manifestations of character.
But if the child hysteriate because of each trifling, and you used all the methods of preventing an attack, then in this case the help of a specialist is required, and a child neuropathologist or a psychologist should be visited.
With the whims of kids face absolutely all parents. But when the hysteria of the child begins at 3 years old, many adults come to confusion. After all, very often they arise suddenly without visible reasons. Why is it going on and is it possible to prevent an emotional explosion? How to behave to parents not to harm the children's psyche?
Causes of children's hysteria
Hysterical is called the condition of nervous exconctions, when a person is able to lose self-control. Kids are more often found at an early age, about 4-5 years. At the same time, the crumb can cry, scream, knock on legs or swing their hands, and some even starts to ride on the floor. Usually at such moments, the child does not notice anything around and do not hear the persuasion of adults.
The main causes of hysterics in 3 years may be as follows:
- Way to get attention. Typically, such behavior of the kids is observed in those families where parents are constantly engaged in their affairs or a younger child is born to whom adults pay more time. So that such behavior has not turned into a habit, you need to work with the reason - to play, to give time and not to be distracted anymore anything, attract a child to your business. Read also an article on how to prepare an older child to the birth of the younger \u003e\u003e\u003e
- The child wants to get something, for example, a new toy. In order not to blush in the store, before going around you need to negotiate with the baby, discussing what exactly you can buy today.
- The child has not yet learned the words to express discontent. And adults should teach it to it. You just need to talk more often with the baby.
- Overwork, lack of sleep, feeling of hunger, cold, etc. If your child is inclined to such behavior, try to stick to a certain mode. This will prevent hysterics before bedtime at 3 years. Read more about a dream of a child in 3 years. Watch the seminar How to quickly put a child to sleep? \u003e\u003e\u003e
- Disease and poor well-being during this period. The fallen kid needs to provide a comfortable psychological regime.
- The child is trying to imitate his parents. If someone is inclined in your family to hysterics and conversations on elevated colors, then it is strange to be surprised that Kroch behaves in a similar way. In order to prevent such situations, it is important to revise your own behavior, it is especially necessary to behave restrained in the presence of a baby. See the seminar about the roles of my mother and dad's parents: bring up together \u003e\u003e\u003e
- The manifestation of adults of hyperteks or frequent punishment of the child.
- Fear or fright. Night hysteries in a year can happen because the baby dreamed of a terrible dream, and he could inadvertently saw a terrible scene on TV. For the most common fears, see the category \u003e\u003e\u003e
How to react to hysterics
Hysteria without a reason in a child in 3 years can happen quite often. At such moments, the crumb cannot control themselves. But the worst thing is that such a condition can be transmitted to an adult, which will cause anger and sense of despair. But the cry or physical punishment will cause the loss of respect from the kid.
How to react to such child behavior and how to calm the child during hysterics?
- During the hysteria, be near, but do not climb towards the child.
- You can try to distract the baby from his emotion, but if it does not work, then you just need to wait.
- At the time of hysterics, do not look, do not talk, do not try to form a child - he does not hear you.
- If frequent hysteries in a child are 3 years old are associated with the wrong day or hunger or hunger - your task is to provide these moments and bypass them.
- Never punish the child physically.
If still parents failed to cope with their own anger, then it is necessary to explain to the child why you are angry. At the same time, it is impossible to give the baby to feel guilty. Your task is not to wean the crumb to be angry, but to teach it to manage your own emotions.
What can not be done by parents when hysterical in a child
If all the children's hysterical failure cannot be avoided, parents must learn to respond correctly. This should avoid common errors that can further aggravate the situation:
- No need to try to keep up the manipulative hysteria. If you immediately give the child what he demands, hysterics will never stop. So even at an older age, he will manipulate his parents. Much more efficiently try to switch the attention of the crumbs by showing the smelling and creative abilities.
- Do not brighten the child and do not argue with him. Now he will not hear you anyway. Talk later when he calms down and will be in a good mood.
- Do not Cry. Increased voice will make children anger even stronger.
- Do not punish the crumb for such behavior.
- Do not be ashamed of the child's behavior before others, even if everything happened in a public place. If you, fearing the condemnation of others, go to the baby on occasion, then public hysteries will become familiar. Even if passersby try to intervene in a situation, do not react to their comments.
- No need to take such a kid behavior to heart.
How to quickly stop hysteria
Parents who often face similar mental attacks would like to find a way to stop hysteria in a child in 3 years.
- It is important not to give in to a panic and show the child that his behavior, somehow hurt you. It should be a cold-blooded and continue to engage in your affairs. You can even go to another room, but only in such a way as to be able to observe the baby. At the same time, it is not necessary to leave it one for a long time, otherwise it can be frightened. Trying at such moments, something is useless to explain something, so leave a serious conversation for later. Seeing that the hysterical child will not be able to get the desired, he will very quickly calm down and next time it will not resort to such a manipulation method.
- If you decide to put an end to hysteries, do not stop at half the way. This is the most common parental mistake, as a result of which hysterics will have to listen very and very often.
- As soon as the child begins to shout, in the first few minutes you can try to talk to him, finding out what he wants. Offer together to play or. If the hysteria is already in full swing, then this method will not be effective.
- Try just hug a child and say how much you love him. If the child impedes this, do not insist.
It is impossible to avoid children's hysteria completely.
So in 3-year-old kids there is a step of growing up, but it is possible to reduce the frequency of their appearance.
To do this, it is enough to give to the baby. Attention, own ways to bypass conflict situations (look for more details in the Internet course obedience without screaming and threats \u003e\u003e\u003e), it is understood that the hysterical stage passes as soon as the child becomes able to control their emotions.
Children often put their parents in such situations where to decide what to do is very difficult. And one of the most common problems is hysterical.
The kid shouts, knocking his legs on the floor, often throws toys and other objects that come under hand, wanting to achieve their own. What to do parents if children's tantrum has become part of their lives?
To punish the baby, get out of the room and wait until he calms down, ignoring it, or try to calm and reduce the conflict for not? How to effectively deal with hysteries in children of 3 years, psychologists advise.
Crisis of 3 years of age or why the baby began to roll hysterics?
Any outbreak of negativity has a base, and the hysteria in a child of 4 years of life is no exception. And here it does not matter whether you raise your son or daughter, the reasons are always the same. Therefore, in this situation, children stands with an equal share of patience, without sharing them in gender.
Important! The arguments "You are a girl, you should not behave so much" or "real men do not behave this way" - not arguments in any situation, especially if we are talking about hysteria.
The main reason for the occurrence of hysterics in a child is "frustration." The term denotes the inability to satisfy all the wishes of the person who have arisen at this moment. Adults also often have to face this condition, like children, just transfer it calmly, realizing, in most cases, the inappropriateness of their hysterics.
The natural stage of the child's maturity is awareness that the whole world, and including their own parents, do not intend to obey it, which means you have to look for compromises. For a child of 3 years, such a model of the world looks unacceptable, which leads to the emergence of hysterics.
The main task of a sensitive and loving parent is to help the child to survive this time and accept the fact that the world does not intend to obey him. However, behind this is a very difficult task - if you correctly recognize the cause of the hysteria, it will be possible to eliminate it.
What to do, if this way is a child just trying to achieve the desired, or does he not have enough of your attention? Or maybe there is something that bothers him, and he is afraid of you in this, admit.
Why does the child behave badly - the main reasons for disobedience
There is such a concept as the "three-year crisis". And for this, the phenomenon is characterized by a number of problems related to the child's attempts asserted and realize themselves as a person.
Therefore, when it comes to hysterics, psychologists allocate three main reasons for this phenomenon:
Fight for the attention of parents.Even with infancy, we teach a child that his cry is a signal for adults, which means that everything, even the most important things should be postponed, and attention must be immediately switched to the baby. Therefore, it is natural that already a pretty crowned child for 3 years will still try to attract your attention hysterics and whims;
The second possible reason for the occurrence of hysterics - attempt to defend your own opinion which will most likely differ from yours. It is most characteristic of children for 3 years, when they first declare parents "I myself" and try to cope with your own, often the victims defeat. At this stage, the worst thing to be taken by parents - criticism and reproaches that follow immediately after failure. One way or another, they will certainly lead to the occurrence of hysterics.
A separate item can be distinguished by the fact that the hysterias often leads awareness of powerlessness. For example, the baby tried to do something alone, but because of age, he did not succeed. For a parent, this may seem natural, but the child's reaction at this moment can be violent, and accompanied by hysteria.
Important!In no case can you tell the child: "Well, I said that you can't get" or "I also knew that you could not cope." Such comments and dismissive attitude on your part will only confirm the child a thought about his inability to cope with the problem, and over time he will stop even trying to overcome obstacles.
These are the main causes of the "sudden" hysterics in a child who should know and be able to recognize every parent to react correctly to such attacks and as a result, grow a healthy balanced person, confident in their own forces.
Bans for benefit
Another reason for eternal conflicts between children and their parents are prohibitions. We must admit, we forbid our children a lot, although we do it for their good. The problem is that children, like adolescents, there is no promising thinking. That is, in fact, there is no future for them. It seems to be distant and unreal.
Therefore, arguments: "Do not eat sweet, teeth will fall early" or "do not play on a computer, spoil your eyesight" - for them just empty words. The child wants to enjoy here and now, and his consequences are not interested.
Of course, such an emergencyness in no way should be the cause of connivance from parents, however, you need to be prepared that it may also cause bad behavior and the appearance of hysterics. After all, every day the kid's requests grow, and, accordingly, the number of restrictions for him increases, which can be reflected on his behavior.
Important!In no case do not allow the child to manipulate you, and seek your hysteria. Once surrendered, you will give a child a reason to try to do it again and again, and hysterics will continue not yet one month, but also a year.
It should be understood that all the prohibitions that you voiced the child should be stable. That is, putting once the framework, you should not violate them in your will, neither by the will of the child.
Suppose you have decided that now the baby will go to bed in any way no later than nine o'clock in the evening and resistant longer for several days. However, your friends got out here, and having stuck late, you gave the baby the opportunity, let's say, watch cartoons.
Be prepared that after that, during the next few days, in the evenings, the baby will rush to you "unfounded" hysterics. After all, if you yourself violated your ban, then demonstrated to him that the established rules can be changed at your request.
Psychologist recommends!For a healthy and strong kid's sleep, it is not recommended to allow the child to watch cartoons or play computer games, at least 2 hours before sleep. These classes act on the nervous system exciting, which can adversely affect the quality of the rest of the kid.
How to deal with children's hysteries and find an approach to your own child?
Unlike delusions that have previously existed, today almost every parent knows that even at a three-year-old, all children differ from each other and require an individual approach. This is especially celebrated by parents, if there are several children in the family. What previously worked with the eldest may be absolutely not effective with the youngest child.
A decisive factor that determines your actions in the event of a hysterical in a child is its temperament. Those methods that are able to prevent or stop the whims of one baby will most likely only exacerbate the problem of the second. Therefore, before proceeding to decisive actions, it is necessary to understand which group your baby belongs to.
Psychologists advise parents to carefully deal with the concept of "temperament" and not confuse him with "character." After all, the character is amenable to change, and can be corrected by upbringing, while the temperament is laid in a child from birth, and remains throughout his life.
In children, as in adults, 4 main types of temperament are distinguished:
melancholic;
phlegmatic person;
sanguine;
Of course, an absolutely impossible representative of each type is almost impossible to meet, and most often the ratio is in terms of 70 at 30. However, it is for the most part that you can navigate, choosing a method of action.
Sanguini. - The least prone to the hysteries of the Baby. As a rule, they are cheerful, and have a stable nervous system, which easily copes with stress, if you switch it to another activity. Such a child can easily distract if he offers a new, interesting occupation, or entertainment. They love to spend time with adults - parents, grandparents, working together.
The only difficulty arising in the process of such a baby - Sanguins are very cunning. Make the baby to do something against his will is almost impossible, and here it is impossible to use too hard methods so as not to inflict the injury. Hob your patiently, persistently, but gentle. Their behavior directly depends on your appeal with them.
Council of the psychologist! If the grandmother takes part in the child's raising, then you will definitely make a unified model of action with it while the child rises hysteria. Otherwise, he will quickly understand who they act, and who are not.
Such children cannot be overly praised if they really do not deserve it, as they are prone to overestimated self-esteem, which can later lead to the development of "star disease". Be moderate, both in your praise, and in criticism. Soberly evaluate the achievements of the child, carefully pushing it not to stop on the achieved.
Melancholic - One of the most demanding types when it comes to raising a child for 3 years. They are easily upset and lose faith in their own strength. They are very susceptible to stress, quickly get tired, and raise the voice, and even more so, to physically punish such a child is categorically prohibited. Otherwise, in the future, you will have to spend a lot of time to eliminate the consequences of this upbringing.
Such children experience serious loads, going to kindergarten, and at this time they need special support from parents, grandparents. The cause of hysterics in such children is most often inability to cope with the circumstances independently, and you need to show maximum patience for the time while the baby is adapted to the new environment.
As educational measures, such children are categorically not suitable for "reading notations", as well as screams and threats. The best way is to be an example, and in the event of a conflict situation, to first calm the child, and after trying to create the most calm atmosphere in the house for him, spending time with him, without reproaching, and adding it to the emotional attack and indecent behavior.
It will not be superfluous to talk with the educator of a kindergarten if the child is visited already. Explain the situation, and tell us how to be if the child decided to test the strength and rolled the hysteria.
After the child returned from kindergarten, try to give him the opportunity to relax. Children of 3 years often require a long period of adaptation to a new team and a day regime.
Important! Soothe the child - does not mean to promise him to do everything he wants. You can tell him a calm tone to tell him how much you love him, and about what worry about his health and security, arguing its refusal to real facts.
Phlegmatic - Very calm and balanced children. Often they are slow and indecisive. In this case, the most effective way of exposure will be verbal explanation. Such kids are very susceptible to conversations, and if they are engaged in their upbringing, then literally after one or two months, hysterics will simply come to no, lifting the place of equilibrium and the search for compromises.
The main thing in the upbringing of phlegmatics is not to suppress his desire, and do not dominate him. Otherwise, as a result, a person will grow, who does not know what he wants, and is not able to take an independent decision.
Choleric - The most active and mobile children among all four species. Their hysteries arise, as a rule, constantly, against the background of excessive emotions, as well as as a response to Hyperopka on the part of parents and relatives: Grandparents, grandmothers and others.
Such children are most prone to the manifestation of aggression, which at a three-year-old look like hysteria. It is impossible to leave this behavior here, otherwise with time, it can grow into constant outbreaks of antisocial behavior.
Interesting!To suppress the hysterium of the child-choleric 3 years is almost impossible if reacting with its own methods. Screams and hysterics on your part, only aggravate the situation, fueling the already existing conflict.
It is much better to go from the opposite, taking the tone to the opposite of the child's tone. Quiet, but confidently you should clarify the baby that his requirements will not be satisfied, even if his hysteria continues. It is impossible to go even on small concessions.
You must adhere to your fair requirements, and do not allow the child to manipulate you using your attacks of aggression and whims.
In conclusion, we can say that the upbringing of a balanced child, confident in its power, is the main task of each parent. Therefore, encountered with hysteries and whims from your baby, you must act patiently and consistently, without giving places with your own feelings and emotions.
Always be valid, react consistently, and do not allow the child to manipulate you with the help of hysteria, no matter how many years it has not been.
7 signs of hysterics in a child (video)
Dr. Komarovsky about children's hysteries (video)
Psychologist's advice, how to cope with the hysteria of the child (video)
Upon reaching the child's age for 3 years, many parents face a problem that they did not know before - frequent. Ignorance and misunderstanding the reasons for the hysterical behavior of children, as well as a dead end, how to behave at such moments and stop the frightening behavior of the baby - it becomes the cause of panic many moms and dads. Psychologist's advice will help to figure out what the cause of such behavior in children is 3 years old, how to deal with the hysteries and prevent them in the future.
In the upbringing of such a child, parents need to be patient, constantly praise him, hugging and caress, communicate on equal footing, listen and attracting homework.
Strong
The processes of excitation and braking in the brain in such children are balanced. The child with a strong type of nervous system is almost always vigorous and cheerful, it is easily communicating with others, and for the appearance of hysterical behavior, he needs a significant occasion.
Conflict situations with parents and peers in such kids arise extremely rarely, they sleep well and eat, they will be eagerly engaged in various circles, but they often change their hobbies, because heracted into something, they immediately lose interest in the old hobby. Negative moments in the nature of such children are inconstration, frequent violations of their promises, difficulties in compliance with the routine of the day.
Unbalanced
The processes of excitation of the nervous system of such a child in the brain are dominated over the braking processes, so it is hot-tempered, the freeware and emotionally unstable. Child can enter a new toy or a bright event in an excitement state. Therefore, such kids are bad and fasten, they often wake up and cry at night.
In the circle of peers, an unbalanced child is trying to capture leadership, be the center of attention and events. Such kids do not know how to bring the started to the end. When doing anything, they do not even endure the slightest criticism, they can chain, throw everything and leave, while getting angry and showing aggression. Parents of such children can be advised to be more flexible and patient, teach the baby to bring all the cases to the end, being restrained and mandatory.
Slow
This type of nervous system is characterized by slow excitation and predominance of the braking process. Children with a slow type of nervous system from birth well eat well and sleep, they are calm, can be alone for a long time and not suffer from it, independently finding themselves entertainment.
Parents of such children are often surprised by their restraint, prudence and predictability. The child is slow, brings any started thing before completion and does not like a sharp change of the situation. It is restrained in emotions, so parents are often hard to understand his mood. The Council is to encourage Pado to active actions that develop motor and speech activity.
Children with weak and unbalanced types of nervous system are most prone to hysterics at the age of 3. To eliminate pathology and congenital diseases of the nervous system, parents are recommended to show the baby to the children's neurologist.
The reasons
The older the child becomes, the more needs needs and desires that parents do not always support. It is at 3 years old that the child begins to grow rapidly and respond to the bans of hysteries.
You need to know about the main factors causing a stormy, hysterical protest in children:
Even if the parents establish the true cause of frequent hysteria from their child at the age of 3, they must understand that the emotional sphere of the kid is not well developed in order to stop and suppress the storm of unrest on time. The child cannot control his emotions, he does not capricious on purpose, but any misunderstanding or provoking factor is able to cause whims that develop into hysterical seizures.
The main difference between the hysteria from the whims of the child is that the kid's capricious begins consciously. With the help of whims, a small manipulator is trying to achieve his own, he can turn his legs, shout and rushing to objects, but controls himself, continuing to manipulation until the desired or punish it.
The hysteria occurs in a child involuntarily, the emotions cause a whole storm of indignation, in a state of the seizure of the child beats his head about the wall and the floor, screaming, sobs, many children are prone to the appearance of convulsive syndrome during the hysteria. Your name "hysterical bridge" such convulsions acquired due to the poses of the child - during the hysteria, he disjects arc.
Stage hysteria
Children's hysterical seizures are characterized by the following statifiability:
- Screams. This is the initial stage of hysteria, the child ceases to hear anyone, he screams loudly, scaring his parents, while no requirements put forward.
- Motor excitement. It is manifested by falling on the floor, beating your head about items, hair breaking, etc. The kid does not feel painful sensations at the time of this hysterical stage.
- Sobbits - the child cries loudly, overnight and without stopping for a long time. All his appearance expresses his insult and discontent. Since the child is hard to cope with emotions, after stage of sobs, it will be sobbing for a long time, and emotional state can be described as devastation. After the tantrum, the baby can fall asleep in the daytime, night sleep will be shallow and intermittent.
You can fight hysteria at the initial stage - the stages of screams. If the child stepped over 2 or 3 stage - conversations and attempts to reassure usually do not bring results.
How to stop the attack
Many inexperienced parents who first have encountered such a situation, are interested, as faster to stop hysteria in a child at the age of 3 years. The famous Komarovsky pediatrician claims that the tactics of behavior during the seven period should be as follows:
You should not span on the pope, shouting on the child and report it for bad behavior during the hysteria. He still will not understand anything, it will only strengthen the explosion of emotions. Tactics of conversations will only work after graduation. If the child hysteriate during receipt of the kindergarten, and does not want to part with his mother - you don't need to keep my mind for a long time, it is recommended to leave a child with an educator and faster. So the time of children's hysteria will be reduced.
Hysterics at night
Many parents notice that Kroch began to arrange night hysteries at the age of years, which were not observed earlier. The baby wakes up at night, screaming, refuses to drink or go to the pot, and often mother can not even understand, sleeps the child during a cry or is in consciousness.
There may be several reasons:
To establish nightly sleep and prevent hysterics, you need to deal with the reasons provoking them. It will not be superfluous to show the baby to a child psychologist.
Prevention
Now it remains to figure out how to deal with the hysteries in a child of 3 years to reduce their frequency and level of emotions during attacks. It is recommended to take the following measures:
Immediately after the end of the hysterical attack, you need to hug a child and try to explain to him that Mom is upset by such behavior (but not a child himself!). The baby must understand that parents want to be proud of their chance, and this ugly behavior is impossible to proud. It is important that the child understand that Mom still loves him, despite his bad behavior and sought to minimize caprises.
Fully preventing the development of hysteria at the kid at the age of 3 years is impossible, this stage of emotional maturation should survive every child. But it is possible to reduce the frequency of attacks by paying proper attention to him, believing with his opinion and teaching his patience and self-control.
Much depends on the behavior of the parents - they should be attentive to the child, and with the slightest deviations from the norm (heavy attacks, stopping breathing during the hysteria, convulsive syndrome), contact the children's neurologist and psychologist.
