"If your girlfriend left for another,
then it is not yet known
who is luckier."
Hello dear friend. You are not happy today. Are there many questions on our topic of today's conversation? You got the answers to them. So what if the girl left for another guy? I know it's hard, I loved, I cared, but here she is ... But let's analyze the situation in order and summarize.
Some things may offend you, some words you will scream: “I'm not like that!” - This is fine. An impulsive reaction in this situation can be anything. The task is to cool down with emotions and turn on your head. We proceed to a cold analysis of the situation.
First, let's decide that we are considering an ideal situation - the girl is ideal, except for one thing - she went to live with another man. Because finding out who is right and who is wrong in a couple is cooler than Harry Potter with its secret basements in traditional Chinese. And secondly, you love her very much, which is why you end up killing her.
your condition
Depressed mood, thoughts about her, the desire to see her next to me, and that it was good as before. All you need is her. There won't be any more. You want to hear her apologies, see her tears and plead for you, to allow her to return after such a betrayal. And all this is seasoned with oppressive mental pain.
Friends, the above experiences are a natural human reaction to such stress. But now I need a cool head from you.
Bad because...
- You are used to it.
- Invested in it spiritually and financially.
- I got hooked on the emotions that she gave.
- It's comfortable with her.
- He became attached to her specific "chips" in everyday life, sex, etc.
- ___________ (add your own, write in the comments)
Something went wrong
There can be a lot of reasons, but let me tell you about the top ones, and you will determine your own.
- Passed love, and to each other, you failed or missed the time and moment.
- different social status. You are a student - she is from a wealthy family.
- Big age difference either way.
- Different views on relationships, family, children.
- Women don't want to see a man's weaknesses. Guys often put her desires before their own, are jealous of every pillar, fulfill her whims, silently endure disrespect for themselves and their affairs, do not have a goal in life or give up their aspirations because of her.
- They don't care if you love her or not, if she doesn't love you.
- One day you can change spontaneously, but you can’t go to another. This is a made decision. You were so inattentive to her that you missed the cooling down stage, her mood swings and infatuation with a new or former partner. And he also did not determine that she was being seduced and lured away.
- Women with a normally configured “filter” do not prefer money specifically, like paper pulp (we are not talking about employees of an ancient profession - priestesses of love who eat and love), but to get it.
- A confident man is always a priority.
- Like you now, she does not need. This means that as soon as you change outwardly, morally, professionally, she can easily consider you as a party again.
What not to do
- No need to beg to stay, to promise mountains of gold and goulash from your own liver.
- Call, constantly send SMS and thereby amuse her pride and raise self-esteem.
- To show that you are afraid to be left without her, that you will no longer have such people, and she is the best thing that happened to you in life. Thus, you only confirm her decision. This is bad. She doesn't need to know about it, even if it's true for you.
- Put whining statuses on social networks, pictures with pain and poems. This does not work. It came. Surrounding people do not care about feelings. She now too. Pity is not the best leverage for fixing a relationship.
- Ask about her new boyfriend. Find out why he is better than you. And is it something you really need to know? To beat yourself up even more.
- He says that he is leaving to live with another, so that you would stir and begin to conquer her again? Be sure to start ... hostilities of the bed profile with another lady at your pleasure.
What to do
- You need to fill the emotions from her, new and stronger.
- Spend your free time not with a glass at the monitor with your photos, but in a large and noisy company of friends.
- The more new acquaintances, the better.
- You can call girlfriends with whom you could not communicate with her. Now you can do it.
- Make new emotions unforgettable - several parallel acquaintances and sex with more than one girl? Here is your creed and the cure for the blues.
- Devote yourself to a new-old hobby, business. Was she against hunting and fishing? So go to the Amazon rainforest for a week and shoot the toothiest crocodile!
- Distracted from work? Now you have trump cards in your hands, to get the position of the head of the department, with your diligence and hard work above the norm.
- You have to get over the loss of a loved one at least once in your life. If you manage with yourself, the vaccine will remain for life.
- Change your style - rearrange the house, throw away the excess, change your hair, buy what you really want, and did not decide before, or she was against it. Go take a break anywhere.
- Understand - if she leaves for another, you are already an ex. He is real.
- Understand with the male mind specifically what has changed in you: you got fat, you didn’t give her flowers or scored on your business.
Subtotal
The task is to make a decision as calmly as possible. During the dialogue, find out what specifically influenced such an act. All the crap that you are so good, and you will remain friends. That it's not about you, but about her - let it pass by your ears. These words mean nothing. Her opinion for you, should no longer have weight.
Even if she tells you, know that you will never know the whole truth. These are women.
Analytically figure out what attracted and kept you close to her this time. "Great boobs!" - this is over the reason, but purely for a 16-18 year old guy calculated. So give yourself more analysis and specifics.
Don't delay breaking up. Live together - set specific dates for the next few days. Living with traitors is not comme il faut. Wool is easier to pull out in one quick movement.
Direct the freed time and consciousness to another vector of your life. Be the best version of yourself! Why not an incentive to fuck the whole world from a charge of anger at an ex-girlfriend.
Return attempt. Nada?
Twice and think very carefully - whether it is necessary to return it. I say unequivocally - do not let her see herself as an alternate airfield. “After all, we will remain friends, right?” Of course it's true! On weekends we will go to the bathhouse, repair my car in the garage, and in the summer we will pour the formwork of the country house together. Not funny? And it should be.
“Over time, we’ll figure out who we should be friends with.”
It is not necessary to be her reader of lamentations in SMS, mail and networks, as the new macho does not act as he should. You are not a good advice bureau.
If you know that she has a different main, think about whether it is necessary to beat her off, because where there is an isolated case, there the system can be seen. Do you have nothing else to do than jump around your "blessed" with a sword and shout "Zashibu!" to everyone?
It rings, you see: “My bunny”, on the screen and immediately melt, and you can’t speak calmly? Rename her contact to "Sleeping with another", you'll see, when she calls, you don't want to be fluffy and run at her request wherever she wants. Change your mind right away.
I repeat once again - it is possible to sleep with someone unconsciously if she was seduced competently. But you can’t quickly take a person out of a relationship. So she already lived with her head for two men, or was with you “so as not to be alone” until a suitable one turns up. Turned up.
Think. But know that often, in order to return the old one, you need more resources and strength than to start a new relationship with a stranger.
The return of the woman's prodigal daughter
It happens. It turned out he wasn't the one. And you are so cool: how do you understand me like no one else! And blah blah blah. What am I, a friend went for a walk, and now she wants to return.
My friend, I understand that in life, as in GTA V, it happens in different ways, but have a sense of your own dignity! You are not a store that is exchanged for another on the days of promotions.
Imagine a picture: one unit fought for another country, and again returned to you with a question: “Yes, something is not as cool there as you have here. Let us fight for you again against them.”
I will make a small footnote: the option that you have a common child is not considered here. There are only two of you. More precisely, three, with her boyfriend.
The decision is yours, of course, but no matter how these inverted "rakes" are fired every year on the days of the spring solstice. Do you know what I mean?
Summary
Gritting our teeth, we begin a new personal life. There are no replacements. The best, sweet, good, obedient girls live next to you in the same yard, well, maximum in the next one! Look around! You don't have to dwell on the past. It's already happened. We must survive. And you already have everything for this.
If it will be easier for you, then I will tell you that she will constantly compare him with you. And no matter how cool he is, in some positions, anyway, you will be in the lead, winding her up with the thought of you and the correctness of her decision.
Alea jacta est or as the pilots say: the point of no return has been passed. Relive this negative event. Don't hold a grudge against her, just cross it out of your emotions. Yes, I did, but now you have two different lives. So live yours!
There is something to tell in the comments - do not hesitate to write. Well done for having the strength and patience to listen to this.
Now the most difficult thing is to start putting the above into practice.
I sincerely support you as a man, and wish you a good and faithful woman by your side.
Anything that doesn't kill
makes us stronger.
